What I Bought Today – HEROCLIX! XD

Weren’t expecting one so soon, were ya? Well, when I went to the comic book shop on Wednesday, I found that they had essentially cartons of the Batman HeroClix, 5 to a box, and I decided to buy one today. Did I see Stephanie Brown inside? Sadly, no. Did I find some awesometastic figurines regardless? Heck yeah! So let’s go over the ones I got today.

Cassandra Cain, AKA Black Bat

And first up, here’s someone who is actually good friends with Miss Brown, who also once served as Batgirl, and has a history of getting the shaft from DC, Cassandra Cain, now acting as the Batman of Hong Kong for Batman Incorporated, Black Bat.

Brion Markov, AKA Geo-Force

Next is the Prince of Markovia, a founding member of the Outsiders, and an affiliate to the Justice League, this is Geo-Force.

Alfred Pennyworth

And next up is Bruce Wayne‘s closest confidant, assistant, butler, and surrogate father who can also serve the role of field medic, here is Alfred Pennyworth.

Jiro Osamu, AKA Mr. Unknown

Another member of Batman Incorporated, here is Jiro Osama, AKA Mr. Unknown, the Batman of Tokyo.

Flock of Bats

…A flock of brown bats…Meh, they’re kinda cool I guess. ^_^

Anyway, that’s all for now. Hopefully I find that Stephanie Brown figure…Though I will admit, I should probably try to get some villains too. I only have three. Ja né!

What I Bought Today – Talon #2, Batman Incorporated #5 (Warning – Spoilers)

Well, despite some kinda suckiness that occurred last night, I present to you what I bought today, and as always, I warn that there are spoilers here. On a side note, I would just like to ask, does anyone else giggle when they see the word “Spoilers” in anything related to DC? Maybe it’s just me, but whatev, let’s take a look at Talon #2.

And suddenly I’m getting Aerith flashbacks.

This comic remains awesome. James Tynion IV and Scott Snyder deliver again with a great story that shows Calvin Rose being awesome, we learn more about Sebastian Clark and why he hates the Court of Owls as much as he does, we also see Calvin’s more sympathetic side as he tries to reach his hand out to help an enemy who has resigned themselves to death, and at the end we see that the Court has unleashed a new, more dangerous agent to counter the threat of Calvin Rose. It’s a great story, but there is something I kind of have to pick on that sort of irritated me a slight amount: So Calvin Rose feels his number one priority is to protect the woman and her child he refused to kill and left the Court over, and remove all records of their ‘sentencing’, and that taking down the Court once and for all takes a back seat to that. We can argue whether he’s right or wrong in that philosophy, but I think what would help with understanding that mindset of his is if we saw a little bit more of their interaction. We haven’t seen any of that save for when they first met. That’s it! But it’s not too much an issue, since the ending of this comic seems to suggest we’ll be seeing them soon.

Also, continuing with my own pet peeve regarding comic books, cover’s kind of a lie since Calvin never actually enters the Tomb of he Unworthy, though we do see it.

My only other issue is that Guillem March was absent for this one, replaced by Juan Jose Ryp. I was kind of confused about that when I found out a couple of days ago, so I contacted Mr. Tynion on Twitter, asking why the change in artists, to which he replied back…

And I quote…

“This was planned right from the start, Guillem is still the main artist on the series, just has a couple breaks built into the year.” So apparently Guillem March is still onboard with Talon, which is good. In the meantime, while I prefer his work, Ryp’s is still fine.

The only way this image could be more awesome is if Damian just shouted “YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!”

Batman Incorporated #5, once again Grant Morrison delivers with this story. Now, I’m just gonna say this, I have not read Batman #666. I HAVE read about it, though, so I get the general jist of what happened. Bruce apparently saw a vision of it when he returned from his trip through time, and he tells Damian about what happens and why he has to leave his father’s side. Apparently it all falls into Talia‘s plans, in that she purposely planted Damian in Gotham to become Robin and eventually replace Bruce as Batman. We also see that apparently making a deal with the devil for Gotham’s protection, and also to become seemingly invulnerable, kind of has its loopholes, as Gotham City degenerates to such a point that the President has no choice but to order a nuclear strike on the city, as advised to him by, you guessed it, THE DEVIL. So yeah, Peter Parker might wanna take note, making deals with the devil can come back to bite ya!

Aside from that, we get some good bits like the return of wheelchair Barbara Gordon in the future, Damian telling his father that the future isn’t set in stone and that, above all else, he doesn’t want to leave his father. And then at the very end we see the Batmen of all Nations being caught in a trap as a building explodes, leading into the next issue that I now have to wait a month for…Grant Morrison, you can be kind of mean with these cliffhangers. lol

He even kinda looks like the trollface here, doesn’t he? lol

Well anyway, that’s all for this week’s comics. Next week, we return to Earth-2, find out what Huntress and Robin are up to, and figure out just what in the flippity-floppity fuck is up with Ivy and Clayface being MARRIED. Ja né!

How To Redefine Failing At Writing Superman – Preview Images for Superman #14 (SPOILERS)

Y’know, as a fan of AT4W, I have seen a lot of ridiculously bad failed attempts at writing the Man of Steel. Among others, there was Superman: At Earth’s End, where Superman decided it was okay to pick up the world’s most ludicrous gun and start a-killin’ people, there was Superman: Grounded, where Superman went around a town and started spewing bullshit philosophy and committed an act of arson, and there was The Dark Knight Strikes Again, where Superman allowed himself to be made into a puppet of Lex Luthor and banged Wonder Woman so hard it created typhoons, an act that would be the dumbest thing in comics relating to sex if not for an issue of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer comics wherein Buffy and Angel do that THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE COMIC.

And then the relaunch happened. Look, I’ve already gone over what’s pissed me off about Superman in the New 52. If you missed it, here…

Related articles

• Superman: Hero of the People My Fuzzy Ass (jygersrant.wordpress.com)

…However, it seems that the product is actually on a decline from even that point, as evidenced by some preview images that have been around the net for the past while. If you don’t wish to be spoiled, now’s the time to click away. Otherwise, let’s analyse, shall we?

…WOW. First off, I’ll admit that while it is something of a burn, calling Clark‘s bed his ‘Mattress of Solitude’ is kind of funny. What was NOT funny and continues the creepiness of Superman’s character as of late is his retort. Next!

And now we’re in the super creep area, as Clark not only feels no need to defend his actions, he is now attacking Lois for her private life…A private life that he snuck his nose into by using his x-ray vision on her so she could read her text messages…NEXT!

…Y’know what? When I finally snap, you’ll know, because I will be heralding this comic as the most brilliant parody/satire of Superman EVER as my only means of coping with this crap.

Now before I go into the obvious problem I have with this page, let me address something else first: The person they’re turning to see? That’s actually Supergirl. And as we all know, Supergirl is Superman’s cousin. To the best of my knowledge, in the New 52, Lois does not know that Clark is Superman. I think you can see where this is going.

But back to the bigger issues here. First off, no matter the continuity, no matter the circumstances, SUPERMAN DOES NOT SAY “BOOTY CALL”. EVER. I am SHOCKED that went through, that ANY of this has gone though. That nobody at DC Comics has seen that and gone “No! Bad Lobdell!” Oh, and I just love Lois’ dialogue afterwards,  which is basically a reinforcement that they will never be a couple again, basically if you were to condense One Moment In Time to a single line. Although actually, at least this IS a single line, not what we got in OMIT.

Also, it seems perfectly clear with the image of Superman and Wonder Woman kissing that the plan is to eventually do some kind of jealousy love triangle, which could be made worse if they involved Batman and Batwoman in there. Oh yeah, long story short, Batman was seen spying on Supes and Diana making out (I’m going to assume for the sake of my sanity that the look on his face was more disapproval and concern at two members of the League being involved romantically, otherwise there goes my intent to start buying Justice League) and Batwoman has sort of a schoolgirl crush on Wonder Woman (though this is JUST a crush, she still prefers her girlfriend in Gotham). Hopefully I’m wrong and they don’t go down THAT road, but who can say at this point.

So yeah, to answer the question posed in the title of this blog entry, THIS is how you redefine failing at writing Superman. So with that said, I’d like to applaud Scott Lobdell for what I’m sure he will indeed be calling a parody of Superman just so that he doesn’t have to commit career suicide when people actually start showing him just how terrible this is. Well, this and Red Hood and the Outlaws, but honestly, for the crap I give THAT comic, I think this might actually be WORSE.

Anyway, that’s my take on all of this. Discuss this however you want, flame me if you must, but please, if you agree with anything I said, spread the word. DC HAS to know what people actually think about this, otherwise it’s just gonna get worse. Ja né.

What I Bought Today – Nightwing #14 and Catwoman #14 + HeroClix!

So yeah, this week’s comics were…well, I kinda suspected this was gonna be the odd week out. The comics aren’t overly bad, just one is filler and the other is just plain weird. Let’s start off with Nightwing #14.

Not really sure why they’re fighting in rain on the cover since they don’t in the comic, but hey, still an epic shot.

Again, this is not a bad comic, I can see the good in this book. The problem is that this is very much a filler story to try to keep the reader’s attention until the Nightwing tie-in with Death of the Family. Lady Shiva kicks the crap outta Nightwing because he’s still hurt from his fight in Nightwing #12, but he manages to stop her from assassinating her targets, a group from the S.E.C. having a meeting (which happens to include his new love interest), only to find out that she didn’t have to kill them, only delay their meeting and force them to call it off. For some bizarre reason, Dick thinks that it was Joker that hired her…I don’t know why. Yeah, it was kind of a swerve to learn it was really Penguin that did it, but Joker would make ZERO sense. I will say that the ending is actually an effective cliffhanger that leads into Death of the Family and will make Dick’s own part in that story quite personal. Not much else to say, really.

…In hindsight, I probably should’ve known this would be a weird ass comic just from this cover. lol

Catwoman #14…Yeah, I think I’m gonna be dropping this one. Admittedly, it’s WAY better than when Winick was writing it, but I’m honestly not sure what to make of this. It’s just…WEIRD. It’s not as bad as Catwoman #13, and we at least see that the weird ass chess game was Joker’s idea, which makes it a bit more forgiveable if we know a psycho thought it up, but it’s still weird. I will say that it’s great seeing the Joker flashback where he talks of his past and you don’t know if he’s telling the truth, if he’s lying, or if his mind is making it up. Classic Joker. Otherwise, it came of as a very strange title to me, but I suppose it’s possible it’s just me, so if you feel like checking it out, by all means. Again, the quality has grown by leaps and bounds since Anne Nocenti took over, so that should entice people to check it out.

Speaking of Catwoman, I picked up one of the Batman HeroClix today, and lo and behold, it was in fact Catwoman. I’m still hoping to get ahold of the Stephanie Brown Batgirl figurine, and of course I also need to learn to PLAY the flipping game, but still, I find the figurines kind of neat and at least make for cool collectables.

I could seriously kiss the person who decided to include her Electro-Magna-Gooperangs as an ability. XD

Anyway, that’s all for this week. Next week promises to be FAR better as Batman Incorporated #5 and Talon #2 come out. Until then, ja né!

Stephanie Brown wins 3rd Annual Kick Ass DC Woman Contest

I know, I will not shut up about Stephanie Brown, but I felt the need to share this piece of information. DC Women Kicking Ass, a blog that celebrates DC Superheroines and villainesses that kick ass, finished its third annual Kick Ass DC Woman Contest, a tournament of sorts where fans vote for the winners of each match. This year, the winner was none other than my favourite DC Superheroine of all time, Stephanie Brown (AKA Spoiler, Robin, and Batgirl), who defeated Black Canary in the finals. So, in celebration of this, I thought I’d share Waffles For Steph’s deviant Art group, with the link to where you can see their amazing images in full view, as well as comment favourite them.

http://wafflesforsteph.deviantart.com/

And to DC Editorial, writers, head staff, whomever may read this, I ask you to consider this: Look at the popularity this character has. Look at her track record. Still not convinced? Well, I want you to read this and scroll down to where it talks about Batgirl Rising: http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/life/comics/2010-12-22-ComicsGiftGuide_N.htm

I don’t think that fans are asking for the moon here. And I’m not asking that she replace Barbara Gordon as Batgirl again, but at least allow writers that want to tell stories with this character the chance to do so. It doesn’t even need to be something big and grand that changes the entire landscape of the DC Universe, just let her back in. That’s all. Let the rest  take care of itself. Ja né!

Tales of Dumbassery – The Reign of Terrifying Stupidity…Averted

Quite a bit late, but I decided to upload it anyway as I thank the citizens of America for NOT electing the psycho that is Mitt Romney. ^_^

Preview Images for Batman #15

So yeah, Comicvine has recently released some preview images for next month’s issue of Batman. during their interview with Greg Capullo. I highly recommend that you go check out this interview…

Related articles

• Interview: Greg Capullo Talks BATMAN, Death of the Family and Arm Wrestling Batman (comicvine.com)

…but if you aren’t interested, here are the images. First, let’s take a look at the cover, which admittedly has been available for a while.

And somewhere, Film Brain screams “SYMBOLISM!!!”

I’d make a joke about how Batman’s got Joker on the brain, but that’d be pointless since the cover is outright showing us that. And if that isn’t enough to prove that, trust me, one of the images in this line-up will. Next up is the first of the images I saw…

Okay, my own issues with Red Hood and the Outlaws aside, seeing Red Hood, Batgirl, Nightwing, Robin, Red Robin, and Batman all together is AWESOME.

This seems to suggest a definite stand-or-fall-together story, that the Bat Family knows the Joker is after them all and, despite certain issues they may have with each other (Tim Drake and Damian Wayne can’t get along and NOBODY trusts Jason Todd, although Tim does occasionally sympathise with him…for some reason), the six are going to have to come together if they want to live through this.

Here, we can make out Batman gliding across Gotham, passing over a couple clearly about to go for a home run, before settling on a house showing a family having dinner together. Well, maybe he’s going to watch a family all together as a sign of hope in this horrible situation, or maybe he’s just checking on the people to make sure they’re okay, or…

And the whole family has just been blinded by shattering glass. Or at least they would be in real life.

…or maybe he wants to scare the hell out of them. I can’t help but hear Christian Bale‘s voice in my head screaming “WHERE WERE THE OTHER DRUGS?!?!” at the sight of this. I think the implication here is that the head of the family works for Joker, or possibly used to work for him, and Batman, obviously driven more than a little bit crazed by what Joker’s done over the past couple of issues, picked the worst possible time to grab him EVER.

Okay, I joke, but can you honestly blame Batman for not thinking straight here? Joker has murdered several people by this point, almost killed Commissioner Gordon, kidnapped and blinded Alfred, and has declared his intent to murder Robin, Red Robin, Nightwing, Batgirl, and Red Hood, all of whom make up Batman’s closest circle, like a family, and that he knows their identities, addresses, and even the soap they use, meaning he can get at them in just about any way he wants. It’s probably all Batman can do to not grab the first person he knows for sure is associated with Joker and not torture them for information.

So yeah, Death of the Family continues to get creepier by the issue, and while I’m just about ready to wet myself in fear of it, I continue to press onward. Until then, I’m Jyger, and I remain scared shitless. Ja né!

What I Bought Today – Batman #14, Batgirl #14, Batman and Robin #14 (WARNING – SPOILERS)

So, went to the comic book shop today…Actually, I went twice, since the first time I went they didn’t have the new comics since Monday was a holiday and thus they hadn’t been delivered yet. So I went back later that day and picked up my comics for today. So let’s start off with Batman #14.

I’ll admit, after last month’s cliffhanger, a weekend of trolling from Scott Snyder (https://twitter.com/Ssnyder1835/status/267290321484922880), and a few preview images to pop up recently, I was scared to open this one. Why? Because I was horrified that Mr. Snyder planned to have Alfred murdered by the Joker. Good news, he’s alive. He’s been kidnapped and had his eyes burned with ammonia, but he’s alive. And as if that weren’t bad enough, Joker also manages to put Jim Gordon in a hospital bed and kill several MORE people before dropping a bombshell on the Bat Family: He knows who they all are, and he’s coming to kill them one by one, feeling they make Batman too soft. The stage is set as Joker begins his plot, and it honestly looks like not a single member of the team is even remotely safe.

Scotty, I gotta ask. Why do you seemingly have this insatiable desire to make your readers piss themselves in fear? lol Also, major props to Greg Capullo as always for taking this dark and gritty story and giving it just the right artwork for it.

Batman and Robin was alright. I like that it’s not JUST glorified filler, and that Joker does have a role in it, in that he was responsible for setting the villains of this book on Gotham. The problem is, I have no idea who or what these people are. This is becoming a problem with Batman and Robin, as ever since the initial arc ran up, it’s been small angles in between crossover events. They aren’t really bad, they just aren’t interesting enough to leave an impact. Damian isn’t really that much of a dick in this issue, thank goodness, and it is good to see them continuing to work with the family dynamic between Bruce and Damian. Still, we gotta have something more soon.

Batgirl. Okay, let me just get this out of the way first: They need to let Admira Wijaya do this series, not just the annual. I ADORED the artwork for Batgirl Annual #1, and while this issue doesn’t have bad artwork in any way, shape, or form, I still feel Admira’s was better. Just saying.

Anyway, as far as the story goes, HOLY FUCKING SHIT, this is creepy! Batgirl finds herself having to leave her new home and room-mate after Joker’s men attack her in a new spin on what happened to her years ago, all the while receiving sick, demented calls and tips from the Joker. However, after finding Joker and her mother at the roller rink with Joker whizzing around on roller blades (just because that’s the most fucked up yet funny thing he could be doing right now, lol), it seems she’s been had. It turns out her VERY fucked up in the head brother is the one on the phone with her, having led her right into Joker’s trap. However, it seems that death isn’t quite what’s on Joker’s mind for Batgirl. What does he really want with her? Well, lemme put it to ya this way: Check out next month’s cover…

Harley’s gonna go ballistic. O_O

…Get the idea? Anyway, that’s all for this week. Next week, I’ll look at Nightwing and Catwoman, and here’s hoping that they’re better than they were last month. Ja né!

Tales of Dumbassery – Sleepless in SPD

Why can I NEVER seem to stop myself from saying the dumbest things on the planet? WHY??? O_O

Also, in case you’re wondering, THIS is LinearRanger’s show:

http://blip.tv/linearranger

…Ja né!

Outrun Bio

So yeah, here’s another bio for a character in my story, Green Defender. This time, we’ve got a speedster as we look at Outrun, originally thought up by my friend David, who is actually the co-host for Annetto Has A Webshow.

And again, I have to remind you, I can’t draw. At all. Thus, I made the below image with the Hero Machine 3.0 Alpha. Now obviously, this hero is VERY Flash inspired (Barry Allen/Wally West/Bart Allen Flash that is), can’t help it, he’s the most famous superhero with superspeed. There was one request that David had regarding the design, though: No mask. And it’s really simple why: When he’s moving as fast as he does, why bother wearing a mask? No one can see his face anyway. I also gave him a utility belt for different gadgets, which you’ll note just about every one of my heroes has a utility belt or some kind of gadgetry to them. It’s for two reasons, 1) I’m a big Batman fan, and 2) I just feel that even those with superpowers should have something to fall back on in an emergency.

Name: Stanley Davidson
Alias: Outrun
Age: 24
City: Mosswood City
Operates out of: Hidden underground lab under Mosswood City

Bio: Stanley Davidson went to school with many of the members of the League of High School Superheroes, even managing to successfully determine most of their secret identities. During an attack on the school by superhumans with superspeed, known as The Streak, he helped them to hide under the school, only to be caught in the middle of an attack where The Streak phased together into a massive speeding bolt. However, by some miracle, not only did he survive, he was left with their powers and used them to help save the team. Afterwards, he was allowed into the League, and later became a senior member mentoring the younger members until an incident kept secret between a few of the senior members caused him to leave, now operating as a roving ally of Strix’s.

Personality: Stan is usually optimistic, laid back, and easy going outside of superheroing, as he usually needs that time to slow his mind down and relax. He’s generally smart enough to see through deceptions, though his friends still know how to play tricks on him at times. However, he has his moments where he an get upset rather easily, usually when someone is overly stubborn or goes against his set of principles. He’s actually good friends with Green Defender, as the two understand each other and the similar circumstances where they were both made superhumans in accidents that should have killed them, though they can occasionally get on each other’s nerves.

Powers: Outrun, as his name suggests, can run so fast that most people would only see a mere blur, if at all. Because of this, he feels no need to wear a mask. While he can usually suppress sonic-booms, it’s impossible for him to concentrate hard enough to achieve maximum velocity (actual Mach level unknown) and not create a sonic-boom. He can bicycle kick or machine gun punch through stone, steel, and earth with ease. To a living being, his strikes would almost certainly be fatal if he wasn’t holding back on them.

Equipment: Outrun’s belt is equipped with a number of multi-part tools and gadgets that combine together in different ways, including rifles that fire remote detonated plastique, radio transmitters, goop bombs, and EMP charges.

Weaknesses: Because his speed is used primarily through his legs, if he’s unable to move them for whatever reason, he’s completely vulnerable. Also, using his super speed requires a mass amount of concentration to avoid running through walls or into people and/or vehicles. Finally, while he can usually move fast enough that he can barely be seen, this is much harder to accomplish in a small, confined area.