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Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 7.2

Not THAT handily. Like I said, Giovanni's Kangaskhan can actually be kinda tough.

Not THAT handily. Like I said, Giovanni’s Kangaskhan can actually be kinda tough.

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I found out that the Silph Scope, required to identify the ghosts of Pokémon Tower, had been stolen by Team Rocket. As such, I stormed their hidden base underneath the Rocket Game Corner and defeated their boss, Giovanni, thus reclaiming the Silph Scope. This time, I headed back to Lavender Town to enter the Pokémon Tower, find Mr. Fuji, and uncover the truth of what was happening. However, almost as soon as I made my way to the second floor of the tower…

...Tim? There are days I worry that I enjoy beating the shit outta you and your team a little TOO much.

…Tim? There are days I worry that I enjoy beating the shit outta you and your team a little TOO much. Cue theme song!

Needless to say, Mikey has gotten a wee bit tougher now that he's become fully evolved.

Needless to say, Mikey has gotten a wee bit tougher now that he’s become fully evolved.

DEATH FROM ABOVE PART 3!!!

DEATH FROM ABOVE PART 3!!!

I'm warning you, Tim. I've got Ethers, and I'm not afraid to use 'em!

I’m warning you, Tim. I’ve got Ethers, and I’m not afraid to use ’em!

Anyway, after that all-too-casual-by-now ass-kicking, I made my way to the upper floors…and maybe I was a little crazy, but it seemed like something wasn’t quite right…

I know, I'm taking a big leap here, but it just seemed like things weren't quite ordinary.

I know, I’m taking a big leap here, but it just seemed like things weren’t quite ordinary.

Sure enough, after defeating a couple of the Channelers…

...Great. Demonic possession. Rated E for Everyone! :D

…Great. Demonic possession. Rated E for Everyone!

So yeah, the Ghost-type Pokémon in the tower have been possessing the Channelers to battle anyone who tries to ascend to the top. So, after capturing one for myself…

Yeah, I know it was the most obvious thing to call him, leave me alone. lol

Yeah, I know it was the most obvious thing to call him, leave me alone. lol

…I began battling my way through the Channelers, releasing them from the control of their Ghost-types upon defeat.

Okay, you're either possessed, or you're vampires. I don't care which one, just make up your mind.

Okay, you’re either possessed, or you’re vampires. I don’t care which one, just make up your mind.

Luckily, Edge and Milo are both Normal-type Pokémon with Dark-type moves, so they're immune to anything the Gastly can use on them but can dish out super effective damage in return.

Luckily, Edge and Milo are both Normal-type Pokémon with Dark-type moves, so they’re immune to anything the Gastly can use on them but can dish out super effective damage in return.

... ...Uhhhhh...

… …Uhhhhh…

Nnnnnoooope! Nope! Nope! No, no, no, no, NO, NO, NOOO! NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPE! XD

Just to keep his Special Attack stat high enough to deal with stuff like this.

Just to keep his Special Attack stat high enough to deal with stuff like this.

Oh good, a friendly one!... ... ...Wait, if this area is purified, why not corral all the other Channelers into this spot and let the energies undo the possession?

Oh good, a friendly one!… … …Wait, if this area is purified, why not corral all the other Channelers into this spot and let the energies undo the possession?

Anyway, it didn’t take long for me to defeat all the Channelers and free them from their Ghost-type Pokémon. However, just as I reached the staircase leading to the top, where I guessed Mr. Fuji was, I ran into a whole new problem…

... ...Aaaaannnnd scared.

… …Aaaaannnnd scared.

OH CRAP, IT'S MISSINGNO. IN ITS GHOST FORM!!! O_O

OH CRAP, IT’S MISSINGNO. IN ITS GHOST FORM!!! SOMEONE CALL LORD VYCE AND TELL HIM THE ENTITY IS HERE!!! XD

Who's that Pokémon?!

Who’s that Pokémon?!

It's...Marowak!

It’s…Marowak!

…So yeah. Long story short, Cubone’s mother returned from the dead as a spirit of vengeance. In fact, if I may speculate, I’d go so far as to guess that the other Ghost-type Pokémon weren’t really trying to cause trouble as much as get people’s attention. Especially because, as it turned out, Team Rocket was hiding out on the top floor. They’d kidnapped Mr. Fuji when he tried to deal with them himself. After calming Marowak’s soul…

...rather violently, actually...

…rather violently, actually…

…I made my way up the stairs to deal with Team Rocket personally.

This is for Marowak, you sons of bitches.

THIS.

IS.

IS.

FOR.

FOR.

MAROWAK!!!

MAROWAK!!!

One rather violent beat-down set to Through The Fire And Flames later…

You're lucky I don't believe in eye for an eye.

You’re lucky I don’t believe in eye for an eye.

Good. After all that, at least she's at peace now...

Good. After all that, at least she’s at peace now…

...Oh. Well, yeah, I'll gladly take this, too. I mean, if you really WANT to reward me. lol

…Oh. Well, yeah, I’ll gladly take this, too. I mean, if you really WANT to reward me. lol

Feeling a lot better, I decided it was finally time to wake up the Snorlax south from Lavender Town. However, I knew that, when Snorlax wake up unplanned, that they can attack whatever wakes them in a pretty massive rage. Also, in battle, it could use Rest to recover all damage it’d taken. As such, I came up with a plan: I’d have Poe, immune to all of Snorlax’s attacks and now having learned Hidden Power, hit Snorlax with it to have it lose some health and force it to use Rest, at which point, Poe would then use Spite to reduce Rest’s PP. After Rest was completely depleted, it would then just be a matter of weakening Snorlax enough to get in a Great Ball. That would fall to Martini, who would use Thunder Wave to paralyze Snorlax and leave it vulnerable. But first, I’d have to do some grinding with him, possibly even enough to evolve him into a Dragonair.

Overall, the plan seemed pretty close to perfect… … …so I guess I only have myself to blame for just how badly it went wrong. I was on Route 16, trying to get Martini experience, when we ran into a Doduo. It was one level beneath Martini, so…against my better judgment, I sent him to fight the Doduo, thinking he could handle it alone. One lucky Fury Attack later, and Martini was already low on HP, so my first impulse was to recall him and send out Oswald. Except, in a panic, I’d forgotten that, in FireRed, Doduo learn Pursuit at Level 9, and…

...

…My first loss. First soldier down. And one who would’ve been a HUGE help in the game but I’d barely gotten a chance to get to know, all because I made an error in judgment. N. Harmonik was actually quick to point out that I’d done pretty well for myself to last this long without suffering a loss. Probably to make me feel better, which I appreciate. And yet, all I could think of was “Martini was dead, and it was my fault”. And, after returning to the Pokémon Center, I must’ve gone at least a half hour without doing anything in the game. Finally, I knew the pain of losing a Pokémon. I’m not an idiot, really. I know it’s just a game. And yet, that fact didn’t seem to make me feel much better. I’m pretty sentimental, so losing a Pokémon hit me pretty hard. But, after a while of looking at Martini’s grave…

Yeah, I decided to go with making a box of my PC a cemetary for dead Pokémon instead of releasing them right away.

Yeah, I decided to go with making a box of my PC a cemetery (which I spelled wrong, lol) for dead Pokémon instead of releasing them right away.

…I eventually came to a decision: Never again. I wouldn’t make such mistakes so easily again. I would familiarize myself with the movesets of every Pokémon I encountered from now on and make sure to know my team inside and out, their strengths and limitations. And so, with a heavy heart, I left the Center and made my way to face Snorlax, never forgetting who was left behind.

Met in Celadon City
Level 18 – 19
Even in death, he was merely shaken, but never stirred.

… … …Anyway, I got to Route 12, and used the Poké Flute to wake up Snorlax. As expected, he was PISSED, but fortunately, the plan to force him to use up all his PP for Rest worked. Mikey took care of the rest, and when all was said and done…

Now I just need a bumbling sidekick to follow him around. I'm thinking a Duskull. XD

Now I just need a bumbling sidekick to follow him around. I’m thinking a Duskull. XD

So yeah, with Pokémon Tower dealt with and Snorlax awoken and caught, I decided to call it a night. Next time, though, I’m probably gonna be doing some traversing around the locations in Kanto I’ve already been to, largely due to another new item I’ll have obtained. Ja né!

Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 7.1 (SPECIAL GAMBLING EDITION!)

Tenacity is a must in a Nuzlocke.

Tenacity is a must in a Nuzlocke.

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I learned about everything going on in the Pokémon Tower in Lavender Town, but to advance up through it, I’d need the Silph Scope prototype in Celadon City. And hey, it wasn’t like there was anywhere else to go or anything else to do, since sleeping Snorlax were blocking not one but two routes, and Saffron City was still under lock-down. Anyway, while looking for the scope, I detoured to the Gym and won the Rainbow Badge. This time, with my team prepared (and cue obligatory shot of my team because I forgot to include one at the end of last time)…

Ta-da. lol

Ta-da. lol

…I decided to check around town and see if I could find any leads on the Silph Scope. Finally, I managed to find a scientist who worked for Silph Co. who claimed that the scope had been stolen by a thief. Given that Team Rocket grunts were pretty much everywhere in this part of town, it didn’t exactly take a genius to figure out what happened. Also, since the small casino in Celadon was named the Rocket Game Corner, it was pretty obvious that this was their hideout. But how to get in without arousing suspicion?

Y'know, I really look at this as win/win. He gets past his gambling problem, and I get a way into the casino. What could go wrong?

Y’know, I really look at this as win/win. He gets past his gambling problem, and I get a way into the casino. What could go wrong?

...Huh. Well then, it seems the only way to win-I mean, FREE these poor Pokémon is to obtain the necessary coins required to purchase them.

…Huh. Well then, it seems the only way to win-I mean, FREE these poor Pokémon is to obtain the necessary coins required to purchase them.

Yeah, note to self: Never go to Vegas. I have no patience when it comes to lining up the slots, preferring to just hit them rapid fire and hope for the best. The results are piss-off screens like this. :P

Yeah, note to self: Never go to Vegas. I have no patience when it comes to lining up the slots, preferring to just hit them rapid fire and hope for the best. The results are more often than not piss-off screens like this. 😛

Okay, confession time: In the end, I ultimately decided to just buy enough coins to trade in for a Dratini. Leave me alone. lol

Okay, confession time: In the end, I ultimately decided to just buy enough coins to trade them in for a Dratini.

Anyway, after I’d finished gambling for a bit (leave me alone, I’m 30 years old and will gamble all I fuckin’ well like, lol)…

I love how it doesn't even give you the option. It just KNOWS you want to push it at this point. lol

I love how it doesn’t even give you the option. It just KNOWS you want to push it at this point. And honestly, have you ever found an important looking button or switch in a game and said “No, I do not want to push it”? lol

Yeah, spoilers for later in this article, but I thought I'd get one last Mega Punch in here, because I replace it later. Sorry.

Yeah, spoilers for later in this article, but I thought I’d get one last Mega Punch in here, because I replace it later. Sorry.

Well, that confirms that.

Well, that confirms that.

Not gonna lie, MIGHT'VE been overkill. :P

Not gonna lie, MIGHT’VE been overkill. 😛

"Or else" what? You'll continue doing a shitty-ass job in my general direction?

“Or else” what? You’ll continue doing a shitty-ass job in my general direction?

Who's eating dreams now, bitch? :P

Who’s eating dreams now, bitch? XD

...And you're an idiot.

…Judge Judy, you wanna field this one?

Oh, and as I was beating the crap outta Rocket Grunts, guess what happened? 😀

The quite literal tank of my team has arrived. ^_^

The quite literal tank of my team has arrived. ^_^

Yes, I think it's reasonable to suggest that I have a problem with a mafia-esque group who steal Pokémon, have knowingly committed grand theft, and have murdered innocent Pokémon on at LEAST one occasion that I know of.

Yes, I think it’s reasonable to suggest that I have a problem with a mafia-esque group who steal Pokémon, have knowingly committed grand theft, and have murdered innocent Pokémon on at LEAST one occasion that I know of.

Funny story: The guards' strongest Pokémon were a Sandslash and an Arbok. I defeated both with draining attacks: Giga Drain and Dream Eater.

Funny story: The guards’ strongest Pokémon were a Sandslash and an Arbok. I defeated both with draining attacks: Giga Drain and Dream Eater.

So, YOU'RE the head honcho. Been waiting a while to have a face-to-face meeting with you.

So, YOU’RE the head honcho. Been waiting a while to have a face-to-face meeting with you.

Again, I won't lie to y'all. Giovanni's Kangaskhan? One tough momma. I like to think that if these games get remade again to include Mega Evolutions, Giovanni's Kangaskhan will be able to do so.

Again, I won’t lie to y’all. Giovanni’s Kangaskhan? One tough momma. I like to think that if these games get remade again to include Mega Evolutions, Giovanni’s Kangaskhan will be able to do so.

If I had a nickel for every time I've heard that thus far in this playthrough alone...lol

If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that thus far in this playthrough alone…lol

YOINK! :P

YOINK! 😛

…Anyway, with all that taken care of, I decided both I and my Pokémon could use a break before heading back to Pokémon Tower. So, with that said, come back in a bit to find out how that went, as well as my attempts to awaken Snorlax… … …and the unfortunate events that occurred as a result. Ja né!

Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 6

The team at the beginning of this part.

The team at the beginning of this part.

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I got the Flash HM, almost had the shit scared outta me by Milo and a Dugtrio, and made my way to Lavender Town, during which, I taught my team some new tricks, and caught a couple of new team members, like this one…

I am SO sorry, Bro-Orb. lol

I am SO sorry, Bro-Orb. lol

…This time, having arrived in Lavender Town, I decided to take a quick look around and see what all was available to me in town. Pretty much immediately, I found the Name Rater’s house, which meant it was time to make a correction. 😀

YUP. XD Also, from now on, I'm gonna be waiting until I can get back to the Name Rater's house before I give a nickname to my Pokémon. Reason being, I want to be able to check their Natures and whatnot before settling on a name. You'll see why in a bit...

YUP. XD Also, from now on, I’m gonna be waiting until I can get back to the Name Rater’s house before I give a nickname to my Pokémon. Reason being, I want to be able to check their Natures and whatnot before settling on a name. You’ll see why in a bit…

I'll never get over the irony that I made it here for the first time with no losses to my team.

I’ll never get over the irony that I made it here for the first time with no losses to my team.

Oh...So, like, they captured some poor Cubone's ma?

Oh…So, like, they captured some poor Cubone’s ma?

... ... ...OH...

… … …OH…

Aw man, I LOVE Mr. Fuji! He's like one of the best managers ev-...OH, right, sorry. Wrong Mr. Fuji.

Aw man, I LOVE Mr. Fuji! He’s like one of the best managers ev-…OH, right, sorry. Wrong Mr. Fuji.

Anyway, after checking around, I learned that Mr. Fuji went into Pokémon Tower, the grave-site of all Pokémon in Kanto, but that some kind of ghosts are blocking the means to advance. Without an item called the Silph Scope, I decided to head to the location of a prototype of the device, and the site of my next Gym Challenge: Celadon City. However, as per the norm, I found myself facing down…a ROUTE. FULL. OF. TRAINERS.

...I don't have a comment, I just love that line. XD

Okay, why change his line from “rambling, gambling dude”? Is it to avoid issues of gambling? But there’s still a frigging casino in Celadon. o.O

Not gonna lie, I kinda wish there were Vulpix in this version. Mainly because I've seen a lot of Growlithe at this point. lol

Not gonna lie, I kinda wish there were Vulpix in this version. Mainly because I’ve seen a lot of Growlithe at this point. lol

Okay, I know I've been saying there needs to be more Trainers with evolved Pokémon, but I'm honestly shocked to see Muk this early.

Okay, I know I’ve been saying there needs to be more Trainers with evolved Pokémon, but I’m honestly shocked to see Muk this early.

So you'll switch in the middle of the match when the referee isn't looking to screw with me?

So you’ll switch in the middle of the match when the referee isn’t looking to screw with me?…Wow, I’m making a lot of wrestling references today. lol

I know a lot of people aren't fans of Double Battles, but I really like them. ^_^

I know a lot of people aren’t fans of Double Battles, but I really like them. ^_^

Ohh, I know THAT pain...

Ohh, I know THAT pain…

Just a touch, but think about this: If you all move in one direction like that, it'll look really badass. ^_^

Just a touch, but think about this: If you all move in one direction like that, it’ll look really badass. lol

I was gonna hit it with Dig, but every time I hit Pikachu like that, Static kicks in. :P

I was gonna hit it with Dig, but every time I hit Pikachu like that, Static kicks in, and that’s SO annoying sometimes.

POKÉMON ON MOTORCYCLES!!! :D

POKÉMON ON MOTORCYCLES!!!

MY BOY! :D

MY BOY! 😀

Anyway, with all that taken care of, and a new member of the team obtained…

Yeah, to complete the pair with Milo. lol

Yeah, to complete the pair with Milo. lol

…I made my way through the second underground path to get to Celadon City…although, I have to ask: The staircases going into both underground paths are the same size, which would indicate that they’re both at the same depth underneath Saffron City… … …So how do they not intersect? I mean, I guess one MUST be under the other, but the physical evidence doesn’t back that up. And yeah, I know, top-down 2D RPG, but it didn’t HAVE to be this way, especially since we’ve had FOUR GAMES (not counting separate versions) where we go to Kanto, and not once has there ever been an attempt to fix the problem.

Goddammit, another one?! -_-

Goddammit, another one?! -_-

Anyway, I got to Celadon City, and pretty much immediately recognized there might be a problem going on in town.

I know I might be reaching, but I'm pretty sure something's gone wrong in this city.

I know I might be reaching, but I’m pretty sure something’s gone wrong in this city.

…Regardless, I did some digging around town, and couldn’t help but find maybe one or two interesting points of interest. 🙂

You don't say...

You don’t say…

FREEDOM! XD

FREEDOM!!! XD

Y'know, I don't think we EVER got an explanation as to why Eevee was just sitting in a Poké Ball on that desk for no reason.

Y’know, I don’t think we EVER got an explanation as to why Eevee was just sitting in a Poké Ball on that desk for no reason. And yeah, regarding his name…

...THIS is another part of why I'll be waiting to decide on nicknames. I decided to wait and see which Nature Eevee had before committing to a specific evolution. And yeah, I know what everyone says about Flareon, but I still like it.

…THIS is another part of why I’ll be waiting to decide on nicknames. I decided to wait and see which Nature Eevee had before committing to a specific evolution. And yeah, I know what everyone says about Flareon, but I still like it.

For now, though, keeping Firefox at the Daycare.

For now, though, keeping Firefox at the Daycare.

If I need to explain this one, clearly nobody saw Batman Beyond. lol

If I need to explain this one, clearly nobody saw Batman Beyond. lol

...Isn't this town supposed to be really big on keeping the environment clean and stuff?

…Isn’t this town supposed to be really big on keeping the environment clean and stuff?

Hel-loooo, second Double Battle! :D

Hel-loooo, second Double Battle! 😀

I actually really like this Double Battle. It's a great way to train by using the VS Seeker against this duo over and over.

I actually really like this Double Battle. It’s a great way to train by using the VS Seeker against this duo over and over.

And thus, a 3'11", 83.8 lbs. bird obtained the ability to ferry my ass across the region with no difficulty! :P

And thus, a 3’11”, 83.8 lbs. bird obtained the ability to ferry my 5’10”, 200+ lbs. fat ass across the region with no difficulty! 😛

Anyway, shortly after I obtained the Fly HM, I realized that my Pokédex now had 29 pages to it, meaning I only needed one more to obtain the Itemfinder. Now, I could’ve simply given Otis a Fire Stone, too, but I chose to let it learn some new attacks before evolving it. Also, I could’ve fished out a Magikarp from…well, ANYWHERE I hadn’t caught anything already that had water present, to make the 30th page, but I didn’t wanna waste a location on that. Luckily, with Magikarp in mind, I recalled a certain someone I met at the Pokémon Center near Mt. Moon who might have a solution to my problem.

Normally, this would be the worst use of 500 bucks ever, but at this point, that's kinda chump change. :P

Normally, this would be the worst use of 500 bucks ever, but at this point, that’s kinda chump change. lol

On my way! :D

On my way! 😀

YOU GOT A THIIIIINNNG!…50 is going to be a bitch and a half. XD

So, after all that, and a bit of grinding that I wisely chose to keep off-article this time, I was ready to take on the Celadon City Gym, when I found myself with a problem. See, I was planning to go in with Otis, Edge, and Damian. However, you need to Cut your way to the Gym, none of them could learn Cut, and as I’ve noted before, I only ever challenge Gym Leaders using the same number of Pokémon as they have, and the Celadon City Gym Leader, Erika, has three. So, I unfortunately had to cancel Damian’s spot to my team for the Gym Battle and sub him out for Milo. Luckily, that doesn’t apply to the other Gym Trainers, so with him still on my team, I stormed the Gym.

#RememberGourdon

#RememberGourdon

Seriously, why does EVERY girl in this game think I'm a pervert? Did someone staple a sign to the back of my jacket or something saying "Sexual Predator, Keep Away!"?

Seriously, why does EVERY girl in this game think I’m a pervert? Did someone staple a sign to the back of my jacket or something saying “Sexual Predator, Keep Away!”? o.O

Oh God, setting the smell Gloom makes ON FIRE. THAT'S gonna have some terrible results.

Oh God, setting the smell Gloom makes ON FIRE. THAT’S gonna have some terrible results.

Y'know what else you shouldn't like in this Gym? :D

Y’know what else you shouldn’t like in this Gym? 😀

DEATH FROM ABOVE!!!

DEATH FROM ABOVE!!!

Anyway, with the other Gym Trainers defeated, I returned Damian and the rest of my team sans Milo, Otis, and Edge to the PC and took on Erika.

DEATH FROM ABOVE PART 2!!!

DEATH FROM ABOVE PART 2!!!

I REALLY hate to talk smack on Tangela, but...yeah, it really is the easiest of Erika's team. To be fair, though, the rest of them are all fully evolved. Why she didn't have an Exeggutor instead, I have no idea.

I REALLY hate to talk smack on Tangela, but…yeah, it really is the easiest of Erika’s team. To be fair, though, the rest of them are all fully evolved. Why she didn’t have an Exeggutor instead, I have no idea.

I had totally forgotten Milo's Hidden Power was Flying-type. :P

I had totally forgotten Milo’s Hidden Power was Flying-type. 😛

And that's half the badges obtained! :D

And that’s half the badges obtained! 😀

And thus, we’re now at four badges, with the other four still to go. Next time, though, I plan to check out exactly what Team Rocket is doing in Celadon City and hopefully locate the Silph Scope. Ja né!

I forgot to take a photo of my team at the end of this part, so I’m just posting this. lol

Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 5

For those wondering, it wasn't a quick victory. Raichu kept using Double Team over and over. I forget how many times I missed before finally nailing the little bastard. :P

For those wondering, it wasn’t a quick victory. Raichu kept using Double Team over and over. I forget how many times Trinity missed before finally nailing the little bastard. 😛

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I stepped on board the S.S. Anne looking for a party and instead found myself with a bunch of tough Trainers and my Rival all looking for battles. After beating them all and getting the HM 01 to teach my Pokémon Cut, I cut down the branches blocking the way to the Vermilion City Gym and challenged the Gym Leader, ultimately coming out with a win and the Thunder Badge. This time, before making my way to Rock Tunnel (because a certain lazy sleepyhead Pokémon was blocking the fast way to Lavender Town), I decided to trek through Diglett’s Cave to obtain HM 05, which would be necessary to traverse the dark tunnel.

Y'know what's ironic? Nowadays, Flash has an accuracy of 100%, making it actually kinda useful. Naturally, now that that's the case, it's no longer an HM. lol

Y’know what’s ironic? Nowadays, Flash has an accuracy of 100%, making it actually kinda useful. Naturally, now that that’s the case, it’s no longer an HM. I’m still waiting for Cut to have a new effect or whatever, only for it to be permanently replaced by Rock Smash. lol

After getting the Flash HM, I decided to go around looking for new items…

SO tempted to make the Pokémon cloned from this Amber part of my team when the time comes.

SO tempted to make the Pokémon cloned from this Amber part of my team when the time comes.

…visit move tutors I couldn’t reach before…

And yes, THIS is what I've been waiting to do with Buttery: Sleep Powder + Dream Eater.

And yes, THIS is what I’ve been waiting to do with Buttery: Sleep Powder + Dream Eater.

…and decided to re-challenge old Trainers I fought back on Route 3.

Okay, I'm just gonna say this right now: Can you imagine going on a journey as long as this one for real, going through tall grass and rocky caves, in SHORTS?! o.O

Okay, I’m just gonna say this right now: Can you imagine going on a journey as long as this one for real, going through tall grass and rocky caves, in SHORTS?! o.O

At this point, I was feeling pretty good about myself and my team. In fact, as I was on my way back to Vermilion through Diglett’s Cave, because I don’t have anyone that knows Teleport or Fly, I was thinking to myself about how I’ve kept back-ups for my team in my box and at the Daycare, and how I might someday find myself in a situation where someone on my team is going to die and I’ll have to make a choice as to who that is, but ultimately realized that I couldn’t really consider letting any of them die. The six in my party currently had been doing such a good job, and other than for the sake of traversing certain areas or challenging specific Gyms, I saw no reason to split up a winning team and didn’t wanna see any of them die. And just as I was thinking that…

…This game is intent on giving me a heart attack. I just know it.

Fucking Dugtrio pops up outta nowhere. It had never even occurred to me that I might end up running into another one after Trinity. Heck, more often than not, I’ll usually only ever run into ONE Dugtrio in Diglett’s Cave one time and then never again. But now, here one was, at Level 29, facing down Milo, who was at Level 23. I couldn’t recall him, I couldn’t run away. For a few moments, I was frozen thinking that, because I’d chosen not to have a Flying-type out in front, Milo was about to die. And I just remembered thinking to myself about how, it doesn’t matter how prepared you think you are, how strong you think your team is, and how cool a head you can keep, sooner or later, in a Nuzlocke, somebody dies. And there’s no doubt in my mind that that’s the case. No matter who you are, in a Nuzlocke, someday, somebody will die… … … …but, then again…somedays, everybody lives. 🙂

CLOSEST. BATTLE. EVER.

CLOSEST. BATTLE. EVER.

Thank GOD I had an X Attack and an X Defend in my backpack and had neglected to sell them, because otherwise, there’s NO fucking way, with a 6 level difference and a mass power advantage, that Milo could’ve beaten Dugtrio! And as it was, I still ended up having to use a shit-ton of Potions to keep him alive! Also, not kidding here, the last attack before I took Dugtrio out was a Mud-Slap that nailed a critical and reduced Milo’s accuracy. Milo almost died from a FUCKING MUD-SLAP! That would’ve resulted in the worst eulogy EVER! XD Anyway, after that, I opted to move Edge to the front to deal with Diglett for the rest of the trip, and decided to teach Milo Water Pulse in case something like this ever happened again. Oh, and on top of all that, after surviving that battle, Milo proceeded to find a TM 10, which taught him Hidden Power, and apparently, his Hidden Power is Flying-type, meaning he now has a means of taking on Fighting-types. At this point, I might as well just call Milo the Flukemaster.

Oh, and funny story, Drakeman later took out Machop in a single turn with Bullet Seed. It's almost like him and Milo are trying to out-fluke one another. :P

Oh, and funny story, Drakeman later took out Machop in a single turn with Bullet Seed. It’s almost like him and Milo are trying to out-fluke one another. 😛

So yeah, after all that, I made my way back to Cerulean City and Cut my way to Route 9, where another slew of Trainers were in my way to Rock Tunnel. So, of course, after a quick battle montage…

Yeah, when I'm paralyzed and still getting my turn ahead of you, YOU ARE FREAKING SLOW. lol

Yeah, when I’m paralyzed and still getting my turn ahead of you, YOU ARE FREAKING SLOW. lol

... ... ...KEEP YOUR FETISHES TO YOURSELF! o.O

… … …KEEP YOUR FETISHES TO YOURSELF!

First time seeing Charmander, if I'm not mistaken. Awesome. ^_^

First time seeing Charmander, if I’m not mistaken. Awesome. ^_^

Y'know, I can't help but watch this and cringe at the thought of the dental work poor Milo is going to require.

Y’know, I can’t help but watch this and cringe at the thought of the dental work poor Milo is going to require.

Suffice to say, Dream Eater? Working out well for me. :)

Suffice to say, Dream Eater? Working out well for me. 🙂

…I made it to Route 10 and the entrance of Rock Tunnel. Of course, this meant I had new Pokémon I could obtain, so I opted to take care of that first. Especially since I hadn’t caught anything in a while and still needed new Dex pages.

I was gonna call him Bolder, but I didn't know his Nature. Wish we could check that stuff before giving nicknames.

I was gonna call him Bolder, but I didn’t know his Nature. Wish we could check that stuff before giving nicknames. Also, I kinda forgot to get a picture of the other Pokémon I caught: A Voltorb I named Bro-Orb. I’ll include it in the next part. lol

With that out of the way, and having taught Flash to Bro-Orb, I made my way into Rock Tunnel. Unfortunately, I had to go sans Buttery, since I figured the mass number of Rock-types in Rock Tunnel could end disastrously for her, so she missed out on some training. Will have to make this up to her later. Anyway, I ventured into Rock Tunnel and had Bro-Orb hit the Flash…and I swear, somedays, I feel like we depend on Pokémon hidden techniques far too often to get around. You give me a lamp with plenty of fuel to keep it lit, and I’ll make it through this tunnel with little to no difficulty. But yeah, new dungeon meant another battle montage!

Y'know, I don't really feel like arguing cute Pokémon vs big ones. I get the points on either side. Still, I'm just gonna say this: In a Nuzlocke, where you're taking on progressively stronger opponents and criticals can equal death? Go big.

Y’know, I don’t really feel like arguing cute Pokémon vs big ones. I get the points on either side. Still, I’m just gonna say this: In a Nuzlocke, where you’re taking on progressively stronger opponents and criticals can equal death? Go big. There’re exceptions, of course, but for the most part? Bigger is better.

And another Charmander! Kinda weird place to train one, though.

And another Charmander! Kinda weird place to train one, though.

Actually, I have a friend who once cosplayed as Eevee. Was adorable. lol

Actually, I have a friend who once cosplayed as Eevee. Was adorable. lol

Heh, funny you should mention that...

Heh, funny you should mention that…

And I thought cats hated water. :P

And I thought cats hated water. 😛

Something that's always bugged me about dungeons in Pokémon: Other than Strength puzzles, there aren't a lot of dungeons that have traditional RPG puzzle solving. That's more saved for the Gyms. What's up with that?

Something that’s always bugged me about dungeons in Pokémon: Other than Strength puzzles, there aren’t a lot of dungeons that have traditional RPG puzzle solving. That’s more saved for the Gyms. What’s up with that?

So, one or two members of my team learned new tricks in the dungeon...

So, one or two members of my team learned new tricks in the dungeon…

...I think they may have been concerned that Milo was showing them up. lol

…I think they may have been concerned that Milo was showing them up. lol

FIRE AWAY! :D

FIRE AWAY! 😀

Okay, gotta ask: Do ALL creepy perverts in the Pokémon world wear bright red and blue? Am I just wearing the wrong clothes or something?

Okay, gotta ask: Do ALL creepy perverts in the Pokémon world wear bright red and blue? Am I just wearing the wrong clothes or something?

... ... ... ...Screw it. :P

… … … … … …

… … … …Screw it. Pokémon MMD clips, I need you again!

Thank you!

Umm... ... ...no. lol

Umm… … …no. lol

Oh hey, it's one of the missing Dudley Boyz! I guess Big Daddy Dudley had some women in Kanto, too. XD

Oh hey, it’s one of the missing Dudley Boyz! I guess Big Daddy Dudley had some ‘close friends’ in Kanto, too. XD

Anyway, that was pretty much my trip through Rock Tunnel in a nutshell. Although, that said, just before I got out and into Lavender Town…

…Yyyeah, despite Oswald and Drakeman’s best efforts, I think it’s safe to say that Milo was the MVP of this part. lol Also, while I’m gonna miss him finding items all the time, immunity to paralysis is gonna be great.

But yeah, with that, I safely made it to Lavender Town and rested up my team. Next time, I’ll be checking the town out before heading to Celadon City and gaining my fourth badge, but not before I get a couple of things done, like getting a shot of Bro-Orb. lol Ja né!

For reference, this was my team at the beginning of Part 5...

For reference, this was my team at the beginning of Part 5…

...and this is my team at the end of it. lol

…and this is my team at the end of it. lol

Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 4.2

My team at the beginning of this phase.

My team at the beginning of this phase.

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I arrived in Vermilion City, but in order to better ready myself both for the Trainers on the S.S. Anne and Lt. Surge, and to increase the number of pages in my Pokédex, I used my new VS Seeker to re-challenge Trainers I’d previously encountered for additional Experience in order to level up and evolve my team. This time, feeling ready for battle, I took my team to the S.S. Anne.

And for those wondering, who have never played these remakes of the original games, yes, the truck is still there, and NO, there is not a Mew under it...though you CAN find a Lava Cookie.

And for those wondering, who have never played these remakes of the original games, yes, the truck is still there, and NO, there is not a Mew under it…though you CAN find a Lava Cookie.

I quickly learned that, while the bulk of the party had ended, there were still a number of rowdy Trainers on board looking for battles. Feeling prepared, I took my team inside and unleashed hell upon the ship’s passengers and crew.

Wish I'd gotten a screenshot of this, but his Growlithe? First time I've ever seen Roar fail.

Wish I’d gotten a screenshot of this, but his Growlithe? First time I’ve ever seen Roar fail.

Yeah, I keep hearing about how Trainers on this ship found their Pokémon from all over the place, and yet I think I can count on one hand the number of Pokémon on this ship that you can't find up to this point.

Yeah, I keep hearing about how Trainers on this ship found their Pokémon from all over the place, and yet I think I can count on one hand the number of Pokémon on this ship that you can’t catch or see up to this point.

Like this fellow, for example. ^_^

Like this fellow, for example. ^_^

Or this one. Also, kinda surprised to see this Tentacool could tank a Confusion as easily as it did. I think it only did like 50% of his HP.

Or this one. Also, kinda surprised to see that this Tentacool could tank a Confusion as easily as it did. I think it only did like 50% of his HP, and then he smacked Buttery around for her lunch money for a few rounds before he finally went down.

Never has that been more true than in a Nuzlocke Challenge.

Never has that been more true than in a Nuzlocke Challenge.

See now, this guy investigates Team Rocket from a luxury cruiser and barely gets anything done. If Looker was here with a suitcase full of disguises and a single Pokémon, he'd have the organization on its knees by now. lol

See now, this guy investigates Team Rocket from a luxury cruiser and barely gets anything done. If Looker was here with just a suitcase full of disguises, a single Pokémon, and a preteen sidekick, he’d have the organization on its knees by now. lol

Okay, who leaves a Hyper Potion just sitting around in a bucket??? o.O

Okay, who leaves a Hyper Potion just sitting around in a bucket??? o.O

So where's Dewey and Louie? :P

So where’re Dewey and Louie? 😛 Also, gotta say, I prefer the older Sailor sprites. Made them look a lot more butch.

Oh God, was he ever off. o.O

Oh God, could you imagine if there were only the first 100? There’d be only two Ice-types, seven Psychic-types, no Legendaries, no Eevee, Voltorb wouldn’t be able to evolve, and no Dragon-type Pokémon to speak of outside of Mega Charizard X. o.O

After a while, I managed to beat all the Trainers on board, so I decided to head to the Captain’s cabin, having heard that he was apparently some kind of sword-master who could teach Pokémon how to use Cut to go through branches blocking paths. However, as it turned out, I wasn’t the only one with that idea, as Tim was waiting for me on the way there and itching for a fight.

Okay, I know the idea is to make it seem like our Rival is WAY ahead of us, but I think if he had over 40 Pokémon, he wouldn't have a team of FOUR.

Okay, I know the idea is to make it seem like our Rival is WAY ahead of us, but I think if he had over 40 Pokémon, he wouldn’t have a team of FOUR.

*sigh* What could've been. I suppose I could always get an Abra at the Celadon Game Corner, though. Still, not like I could evolve it into Alakazam anyway...

*sigh* What could’ve been. I suppose I could always get an Abra at the Celadon Game Corner, though. Still, not like I could evolve it into Alakazam anyway…

Hey, you evolved your Starter Pokémon! And it only took you 3 badges and the majority of a lap around the western half of Kanto to do it. -_-

Hey, you evolved your Starter Pokémon! And it only took you 3 badges and the majority of a lap around the western half of Kanto to do it. -_-

Anyway, having beaten Tim for…God, what is this? The fourth time now? And he’s still ahead of me? Whatever, I beat Tim and made my way into the captain’s cabin, where I-

OH, DEAR LORD, THAT IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING EVER! WEEZING, MUKE, AND GARBODOR ARE RECOILING IN DISGUST OVER THAT!

OH, DEAR LORD, THAT IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING EVER! WEEZING, MUK, AND GARBODOR ARE RECOILING IN DISGUST OVER THAT!

Oh God, the things I do to earn badges...T_T

Oh God, the things I do to earn badges…T_T

After much deliberation, I decided not to make Hank my Cut Slave, since that'd mean either grinding him up in levels too or risking his death. Trinity's a much better choice for now.

After much deliberation, I decided not to make Hank my Cut Slave, since that’d mean either grinding him up in levels too or risking his death. Trinity’s a much better choice for now.

Y'know, I get why the original games do this, but why is it, in FireRed and LeafGreen, are you forced to leave the port after the S.S. Anne leaves and can never return to get that Lava Cookie?

Y’know, I get why the original games do this, but why is it, in FireRed and LeafGreen, are you forced to leave the port after the S.S. Anne leaves and can never return to get that Lava Cookie?

So, with Cut in hand, I headed back to the Pokémon Center to heal up and plan for the Gym. With the Trainers inside focusing on Electric-type Pokémon, most of my team would be at a severe disadvantage. As such, I decided to go in with Drakeman, Oswald, and Trinity. With preparations complete, I entered the Gym and took on the slew of Electric-types.

Seriously, how the hell is America canon in the Pokémon World when no other real world country seems to exist? O_O

Seriously, how the hell is America canon in the Pokémon World when no other real world country seems to exist? O_O

I'm not even touching this one. :P

I’m not even touching this one. 😛

Admittedly, Trinity did most of the heavy lifting in this Gym, but Drakeman and Oswald DID see their share of combat.

Admittedly, Trinity did most of the heavy lifting in this Gym, but Drakeman and Oswald DID see their share of combat.

Admittedly, I kinda wish Surge's Raichu was more like it was in the anime: Possessing powerful attacks but lacking any kind of defensive moves.

Admittedly, I kinda wish Surge’s Raichu was more like it was in the anime: Possessing powerful attacks but lacking any kind of defensive moves.

Three badges, baby! :D

Three badges, baby! 😀

So, with my third Gym Badge finally obtained, I decided to heal up and call it a day. Next time, I’ll be heading through Diglett’s Cave to go back and get some previously unobtainable items before trekking through Rock Tunnel to get to Lavender Town. Ja né!

Also, I taught Milo Cut since Trinity is instead going to be a back-up Ground-type for Oswald.

Also, I taught Milo Cut since Trinity is instead going to be a back-up Ground-type for Oswald.

Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 4.1 (SPECIAL GRINDING EDITION!!!!)

I love these previously on's that the journal provides. ^_^

I love these “previously on”‘s that the journal provides. ^_^

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I made my way up through Nugget Bridge and Routes 24 and 25, battling Tim Oak and the various Trainers along the way, caught some new Pokémon, met up with Bill, got a ticket to go to the party on the S.S. Anne, fought some Rockets up to no good, and managed to score the Cascade Badge from Misty. This time, I decided to head south to Vermilion City. Unfortunately, while I could’ve otherwise cut through Saffron City…

Danged dehydrated guards. -_-

Danged dehydrated guards. -_-

…yeah, that was a thing. lol So, instead, I took the underground path and came out in Route 6, on the other side of Saffron, and battled my way through some Trainers.

Yeah, as a matter of fact, there are NO Bug-types on this Route.

Yeah, as a matter of fact, there are NO Bug-types on this Route.

Funny story: In Yellow version, these two are replaced by Joe and Giselle from the anime. :P

Funny story: In Yellow version, these two are replaced by Joe and Giselle from the anime. 😛

… …Screw it, play the damn clip. XD

HEY, someone's actually got an evolved Pokémon! :D

HEY, someone’s actually got an evolved Pokémon! 😀

...Okay, YOU are just cheating. lol

…Okay, YOU are just cheating. Also, Jeff meets Camper Jeff. 😛

Anyway, to make a REALLY long story short, I made it to Vermilion City, healed up, went to the Pokémon Fan Club, listened to the chairman talk for God knows how long about his Rapidash in ways that STILL haunt me to this day, got the Bike Voucher, and traded it for a bike back in Cerulean. Afterward, I noticed that my overall Pokédex count was low (in terms of captures), and I realized why: Because I can only catch one Pokémon per Route, and the only other Pokédex pages are provided by gift Pokémon and evolving them and the Pokémon I catch. Unfortunately, battling wild Pokémon and once-off Trainers for experience meant filling up my Pokédex enough to get the items that Professor Oak’s aides have would take FOREVER. On top of that, I also wasn’t feeling great about my levels going into S.S. Anne and battling Surge. Luckily…

…YEAH. So, after catching the Pokémon found in the surrounding area…

Milo and Otis reference, AND I used to sort-of have a cat named Milo. Really, it was a neighbour's cat, but he liked us more. lol

Milo and Otis reference, AND I used to sort-of have a cat named Milo. Really, it was a neighbour’s cat, but he liked us more. lol

Get it? Edge? It's a SPEARow?

Get it? Edge? He’s a SPEARow?

THIS bitch almost killed Buttery. It was SO close, I thought for sure she was about to be killed. O_O

THIS bitch almost killed Buttery. It was SO close, I thought for sure she was about to be killed. O_O

…I decided to go about training by battling Trainers and then having rematches via the VS Seeker. However, what ended up happening was that I took SOOOOOO many photos of me grinding levels. So, with that said, here’s a quick rundown of some of the highlights. ^_^

My boy! :D

My boy! 😀

Why can't you be like that other Bug Catcher and have an evolved Pokémon?

Why can’t you be like that other Bug Catcher and have an evolved Pokémon?

Came prepared for you this time, asshole! :D

Came prepared for you this time, asshole!

NOT how I meant!

NOT how I meant!

Okay, Santanico doesn't have Intimidate, thank goodness, because there's NO WAY it should've worked here had she.

Okay, Santanico doesn’t have Intimidate, thank goodness, because there’s NO WAY it should’ve worked here had she.

Butterfree's actually REALLY good at the Para-fusion combo, and the only reason Buttery doesn't use it is because...I'm going for something else. :)

Butterfree’s actually REALLY good at the Para-fusion combo, and the only reason Buttery doesn’t use it is because…I’m going for something else. 🙂

I was expecting this battle to be a little closer, to be honest.

I was expecting this battle to be a little closer, to be honest.

Not sure, but I think this might be the first case of seeing a Fire-type so far.

Not sure, but I think this might be the first case of seeing a Fire-type so far.

Anyway, after a while of that, I was rewarded with the following:

Also, since he's not a mandrake anymore, pretty sure I'll be renaming him when I reach Lavender Town.

Also, since he’s not a mandrake anymore, I think I’ll be renaming him when I reach Lavender Town.

Pretty sure Edge just replaced Damian on my team, but of course, I'll keep Damian as my back-up Flying-type and an HM Slave for when I get HM 02.

Pretty sure Edge just replaced Damian on my team, but of course, I’ll keep Damian as a back-up Flying-type and an HM Slave for when I get HM 02.

With all that done, I finally decided to return to Vermilion and head to the S.S. Anne. So, sorry this article turned out to basically be one big grind session, but I figured I’d include it just for funsies, and so that you know just how much time was put into preparing. Anyway, be sure to check in next time for Part 4.2 as I take on the S.S. Anne. Ja né!

The results of my training.

The results of my training. A shame Milo won’t get Limber until evolving, because he’d otherwise be great for the Vermilion City Gym.

Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Part 3

My team at the beginning of this phase of my journey.

My team at the beginning of this phase of my journey.

Last time in the Pokémon FireRed Text-And-Screencap-Only Nuzlocke Challenge, I headed into Mt. Moon, battled several tough Trainers, added new members to my team, evolved a couple of pre-existing ones, took down several members of Team Rocket, and obtained both the Dome Fossil and Moon Stones. This time, starting off in Cerulean City, I decided to prep my team for taking on Misty by battling the Trainers on my way to meeting up with Bill the Pokémaniac, creator of the PC Storage System. Before that, though, I decided to swoop back to Route 4 (the eastern half of it, anyway) and do some training. And, while I was there, I caught a new Pokémon.

No, I've never watched From Dusk till Dawn, but I was trying to come up with a nickname for this, and that was the best I could think of. lol

No, I’ve never watched From Dusk till Dawn, but I was trying to come up with a nickname for this, and that was the best I could think of. lol

…I’ll be honest, I have no idea what I’m gonna do with this one. Not because I have any kind of issue with Ekans, just that my team has already become a little Poison heavy, but we’ll get to that in a bit. Still, might be a good idea to have it as a back-up. In the meantime, though, I had…slightly different snakes to concern myself with.

"Which is why I only have a team of 4!" XP

“Which is why I only have a team of 4!” XP

I swear, it's almost like this Abra is here specifically for the purpose of getting the newbie on your team some experience.

I swear, it’s almost like this Abra is here specifically for the purpose of getting the newbie on your team some experience. That said, probably the best use of Leech Life and Astonish I’ve ever gotten.

...Okay, I'm with Petty on this one: You fucking hack evolved your Level 17 Pidgey into a Pidgeotto, but you didn't evolve your Level 18 Starter? WTF? o.O

…Okay, I’m with Petty Artist on this one: You fucking hack evolved your Level 17 Pidgey into a Pidgeotto, but you didn’t evolve your Level 18 Starter? I honestly can’t think of anyway this guy could insult me as a Trainer any more than thinking I couldn’t handle his Ivysaur at this point.

...I stand corrected. I'm gonna kill one of your Pokémon the next time we meet.

… …Okay, well, I stand corrected. Tim, I’m gonna kill one of your Pokémon the next time we meet.

Anyway, with that out of the way, I decided to make my way to-

...Hel-loooooo. :D

…Hel-loooooo. 😀

Honestly, at this point, Oswald's kinda become my primary battler for dealing with other Poison-types, unless I'm confident that Buttery can get a quick Confusion in without getting hit.

Honestly, at this point, Oswald’s kinda become my primary battler for dealing with other Poison-types, unless I’m confident that Buttery can get a quick Confusion in without getting hit.

...SERIOUSLY! What IS it with these people not evolving their Pokémon?! Although it was HILARIOUS when I had Oswald use Focus Energy, and then immediately after, the Nidoran did it, like he was trying to copy his big brother or something. :P

…SERIOUSLY! What IS it with these people not evolving their Pokémon?! Although it was hilariously adorable when I had Oswald use Focus Energy, and then immediately after, the Nidoran did it, like he was trying to copy his big brother or something. 😛

... ... ...Why, hello, Pork Laser. It's been a while. WELCOME TO DIE.

… … …Why, hello, Pork Laser. It’s been a while. WELCOME TO DIE.

YES! :D

YES! 😀

... ... ...OH...Wait, does that mean the others were all members of Team Rocket, too? Some of them were kinda young to be grunts, is all.

… … …OH…Wait, does that mean the others were all members of Team Rocket, too? Some of them were kinda young to be grunts, is all.

Seriously, what was your plan? That you were somehow going to beat a guy who had taken down five other Trainers with your two Pokémon? It's not like you were even higher leveled than the rest of them, either. The girl with the twin Nidoran was tougher than you.

Seriously, what was your plan? That you were somehow going to beat a guy who had taken down five other Trainers with your two Pokémon? It’s not like you were even higher leveled than the rest of them, either. The girl with the twin Nidoran was tougher than you.

Anyway, now that I’d gotten past Nugget Bridge, I found myself with…a grassy patch on Routes 24. This is where I got a little nervous. Not because there was anything in the grass that could kill anyone on my team, but because it is known for being home to ABRA. And…well, I’ve gotten to know my luck as it pertains to rare Pokémon at this point. If I ran into Abra, there was no way I was gonna catch one before it could teleport away, and that’d be TWO ROUTES locked off on my journey at that point. So, with fingers crossed, I entered the patch of grass, and…

Fuck, I'll take it! I don't even care that I named it after Hank Pym, I'll take it! XD

Fuck, I’ll take it! I don’t even care that I named it after Hank Pym, I’ll take it! XD

So, with that done, I let out a sigh of relief…and then recalled that Abra was on Route 25 as well. Because why not at this point? I also knew there were Kakuna on Route 25, too, so I decided that, so I wouldn’t end up wasting that Route on the evolved form of a Pokémon I already had, that I should first evolve Hank.

And since I'd gone to the trouble of getting a Kakuna, I thought "What the hell?". lol

And since I’d gone to the trouble of getting a Kakuna, I thought “What the hell, let’s go all the way to Beedrill.” So…

I wonder if I should tell him I'm planning to use him as my Cut slave? :P

Aww, he looks so happy to be fully evolved… … …I wonder if I should tell him I’m planning to use him as my Cut HM Slave? 😛

And thus, with a Beedrill in my box, I headed for Route 25 and waited to see what I’d find…

...Well, I think I know who is gonna be fighting Misty's Staryu. :)

…Well, I think I know who is gonna be fighting Misty’s Staryu. 🙂

Now that I’d caught a couple of new Pokémon, I decided it was time to make my way to Bill’s, while training my team up for Misty by battling the Trainers and wild Pokémon in the area. And thus, TRAINING MONTAGE TIME!

Hmm, not quite as epic as Mr. Satan's, but good nonetheless.

Hmm, not quite as epic as Mr. Satan’s, but good nonetheless. lol

"Sempai noticed me! And then he blew me the fuck away!" XD

“Sempai noticed me! And then he blew me the fuck away!” XD

It's always strange to find someone with the same Pokémon as a Gym Leader one city away, only higher leveled. It's like "Why wasn't THIS person the Gym Leader?"

It’s always strange to find someone with the same Pokémon as a Gym Leader one city away, only higher leveled. It’s like “Why wasn’t THIS person the Gym Leader?”

As you can see, Katherine's kinda stopped being as helpless as she was when I caught her. :)

As you can see, Katherine’s kinda stopped being as helpless as she was when I caught her. 🙂

Okay, THIS asshole scared the shit outta me, and here’s why: I totally forgot that Slowpoke learn Confusion at Level 17 in FireRed and LeafGreen. I guess I must’ve had the other Generation III games on the mind, wherein Slowpoke doesn’t learn Confusion until Level 20. As such, I sent Drakeman in to deal with him, thinking the best he could do was Water Gun. When Confusion hit, I thought for sure I was about to see my first casualty. And how I didn’t, I’ll NEVER know. O_O

...Sure enough, I ran into three of these things, and before I could hit them and try to beat them for Exp, they each Teleported away.

…Sure enough, I ran into three of these things, and before I could hit them and try to beat them for Exp, they each Teleported away.

With all the Trainers on the way to Bill’s place defeated, I made my way inside. Problem was, Bill didn’t seem to be home. Instead, there was a Clefairy sitting around…with a human face… … …At this point, I was ready to piss myself in terror. Then it started talking. And thus, a thousand Creepy Pastas were written. 😛

Yeah, I know it's really Bill. I've never understood this line of dialogue, though. Why would he say that?

Yeah, I’m kidding, I know it’s really Bill. I’ve never understood this line of dialogue, though. Why would he say that?

The technology of the Pokémon world will never cease to astound me. Why can't humanity be inspired to make stuff based on this like we are with Star Trek?

The technology of the Pokémon world will never cease to astound me. Why can’t humanity be inspired to make Poké Balls and PC Storage Systems like we are with stuff from Star Trek?

Yeah, not gonna lie, I'm kinda with Bill on this one. Maybe it's just because I prefer to dress like a dirtbag hipster, but whatevs. lol

Yeah, not gonna lie, I’m kinda with Bill on this one. Maybe it’s just because I prefer to dress like a dirtbag hipster, but whatevs. I’ll take the free tickets to a cruise liner party.

So these must be the "lots of pages to my Pokédex" that Tim was talking about. Don't get me wrong, I love Eevee and the Eeveelutions (that sounds like a band), but it's FOUR pages. I had that many when I first got the freaking 'dex.

So these must be the “lots of pages to my Pokédex” that Tim was talking about. Don’t get me wrong, I love Eevee and the Eeveelutions (that sounds like a band), but it’s FOUR pages. I had that many when I first got the freaking ‘dex.

Anyway, with that done, I decided to head back to Cerulean City, just in time to notice a house had been broken into. The officer outside said it was Team Rocket…well, no shit. I could see the Goddamn Rocket Grunt standing in the back yard from right there. How do you not see that? Apparently, the police in Kanto are completely inept, OR they’re on the take. It’s one or the other. Either way, I decided I’d need to go all vigilante and take the law into my own hands by dealing with the grunt myself.

...No. The Team Rocket uniform kinda gives you away. In fact, why aren't you wearing a disguise like your buddy on Nugget Bridge? o.O

…No. The Team Rocket uniform kinda gives you away. In fact, why aren’t you wearing a disguise like your buddy on Nugget Bridge? o.O

One rather embarrasing asskicking later. lol

One rather embarrassing ass-kicking later. lol

Man, could you imagine if EVERYBODY was able to deal with loss of property that well?

Man, could you imagine if EVERYBODY was able to deal with loss of property that well?

Yeah, we never really did find out what that was about, huh?

Yeah, we never really did find out what that was about, huh?

And thus, with Team Rocket beaten down again, the Nugget Bridge conquered, a few more pages added to my Pokédex, and some much-needed training done, it was finally time to deal with Misty. As always, I went into battle using the same number of Pokémon as the Gym Leader’s, meaning I needed to decide which two would take on her Staryu and Starmie. I’d already decided that, based on type and overall performance (and luck) thus far that Drakeman would lead against her Staryu, but there was still the matter of her Starmie. Katherine now knew Bite, but I wasn’t sure if she could one hit KO her opponent, nor was I confident in her ability to tank a Water Pulse from a Starmie. I could’ve worked to evolve her into a Golbat, as I had thought about before, but that felt like I’d be committing to making her a full member of my team, and with Oswald and Drakeman in the party already, I was clearly a bit too Poison heavy. As such, I ultimately decided to go with Mikey, matching his bulk against Starmie’s Special Attack. With my two party members chosen, I headed for the Gym…

Not kidding, first time using Bullet Seed, and it hit 5 times. Seriously, Drakeman, you are the luckiest Goddamn Oddish EVER, not to mention one hell of a trooper. Speaking of, btw? I was originally gonna name him Steve. I’m not kidding, if he survives to Lavender Town and that kind of crap keeps happening to him, I’m changing his name. lol

Honestly? Not as bad a policy as some would suggest.

Honestly? Not as bad a policy as some would suggest.

Not gonna lie: I had to use a LOT of Potions in this battle. Also, I wanted to punch myself for not raising Mikey ONE LEVEL so that he'd learn Bite. Once again, my lack of memory of the movepools in this game nearly gets one of my team members killed. Clearly, something I'm going to have to be a LOT more careful of.

Not gonna lie: I had to use a LOT of Potions in this battle. Also, I wanted to punch myself for not raising Mikey ONE LEVEL so that he’d learn Bite. Once again, my lack of memory of the movepools in this game nearly gets one of my team members killed. Clearly, something I’m going to have to be a LOT more careful of.

Two badges down, six to go. :)

Two badges down, six to go. 🙂

With the Cascade Badge in hand, my business in Cerulean City was finally complete… … …BUT, before I called it a day, there was still one last thing I had to do. After healing up and withdrawing my team, I called out Oswald and gave him one of the Moon Stones I’d found in Mt. Moon, and watched as he evolved to his final stage.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present the most powerful member currently on my team, and the Pokémon who will lead said team to victory against Lt. Surge.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present the most powerful member currently on my team, and the Pokémon who will lead said team to victory against Lt. Surge.

So, once again, I managed to get through a phase of my journey with no fatalities. Still, I can tell that what luck I’ve had thus far is gonna run out soon, so I’m gonna have to play it smarter next time, as I make my way south to Vermilion City in order to attend the S.S. Anne party and battle Lt. Surge for the Thunder Badge. Ja né!

We're gonna need a LOT more training to deal with Surge...

We’re gonna need a lot more training and a lot less weaknesses to Electric attacks to deal with Surge. But where can I find a really strong and swift Ground-type?

All Power Rangers instrumental theme songs (Unmastered) by Lemos Design

This was just too fucking awesome to not share. Enjoy! ^_^

Jyger’s Favourite 5 – 5 Least Favourite Power Rangers

So, as many people who have come on here are probably aware, I’m a huge Power Rangers fan. I’ve loved the series since season one, and I still watch it to this day. So, as you can imagine, I’ve borne witness to both the ups and the downs of this series. I’ve seen a LOT of Rangers come and go, and while I generally have fond thoughts of most of them, there are also some that have left little to no positive impact on me, or in some cases, NEGATIVE. So, seeing as how Super Megaforce just ended with all of the Rangers brought together, and I’ve already done a list on some of my favourite Rangers, I thought now would be a good time to reflect on those that didn’t leave such a great impression. Now, before I start, I should probably lay out some ground rules:

  1. One per team. Once I’ve chosen a Ranger from a specific team, I cannot choose one from that team again. Otherwise, I’d likely be mostly picking on Rangers from the same two to three teams a lot.
  2. It has to be a problem with the character and not the actor. As such, I don’t think I’ll put Kevin from Samurai on this list, since my biggest issues with him have more to do with his actor’s performance. Also, Will from Operation Overdrive won’t be on this list, since the character, how he’s written, and how he’s portrayed have nothing to do with Samuell Benta’s actions in the past…Plus, I just have far bigger fish to fry with Overdrive. lol
  3. I won’t be using comparisons to their Super Sentai counterparts as reason to put them on this list. While it’s perfectly fine to prefer a season of Super Sentai to its counterpart or vice versa, that is not why I’m doing this. I’m analyzing the characters for their own merits, or lack thereof.

Oh, and because there’s a member of Megaforce/Super Megaforce on this list, there will more than likely be spoilers, so consider yourselves warned now. And of course, this is all opinion based, so don’t freak out if I dislike your favourite Ranger, and as usual, this list is in no real order. With that outta the way, let’s look at my 5 Least Favourite Power Rangers, starting with…

#1 - Sam, the SPD Omega Ranger

#1 – Sam, the SPD Omega Ranger

Yeah, going right for one of the more obvious choices. Although, I should make clear: While Sam being a ball of light throughout SPD is a huge problem, it’s not the only reason he’s on this list. Really, it comes to just how little he actually does. I mean, he’s commonly seen helping the team in action, but aside from that, what does he really do? Even as a ball of light, there’s a lot more they could do with Sam. Heck, do an episode where he feels detached from the rest of the team as a result of this. Or maybe have him showing constant concern over his continued presence in the past and how it could affect the future (I think he only reflects on it maybe once or twice in the whole time he’s there). But nope, he apparently does not give a crap. Also, I don’t know whose fault it is, be it the voice actor or the people directing him, but Brett Stewart’s delivery comes off as very odd, like he’s never taking anything that’s going on seriously. And I know I said I wouldn’t compare to the Sentai counterparts, but something that’s always bugged me is the choice to still have Sam be the one to save the team from Mirloc, when the plot of that two-parter is changed to focus on Sky instead of him (in Dekaranger, Mirloc’s counterpart had instead killed DekaBreak’s parents). Ultimately, though, the Omega Ranger makes it on this list as a classic case of wasted potential.

#2 - Lucas Kendall, the Blue Time Force Ranger

#2 – Lucas Kendall, the Blue Time Force Ranger

Okay, I should probably start off by saying that I don’t HATE Lucas. I simply find his character to be…well, very uninteresting, which is more than a little off-putting, considering how he’s supposed to be the cool guy of the Time Force Rangers. He’s basically the Power Rangers equivalent of doing THIS:

…Oh yeah, I went there. lol Now, here’s where he’s a bit more redeemable in my eyes than some of the others on this list: Because while I find that aspect of him uninteresting, you get the idea on multiple occasions that it’s a very blatant smokescreen. Plus, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t find IMMENSE entertainment in the episode where this came back to bite him in the worst way, when Nadira thought he was in love with him, and he had to scare her off by acting like a slob. His entrance in that scene alone might just be one of the funniest Goddamn things I’ve ever seen in Power Rangers. So yeah, he makes the list, but I can’t really hate him. This next one, however…

#3 - Dax Lo, the Blue Overdrive Ranger

#3 – Dax Lo, the Blue Overdrive Ranger

…OH GOD, Dax. Like I said, I had to choose only one Ranger per team, meaning I couldn’t just spend this entire article complaining about the Overdrive team being a bunch of privileged jerks who up and quit in Once A Ranger. Also, while Will performs actions in one episode that make him a bit unlikable in hindsight, he does not earn my resentment quite like Dax does. He is by far, in my opinion, the worst Power Ranger EVER. His civilian power is stupid, basically making him Bouncing Boy from the Legion of Super Heroes. His weapon is kinda dumb, although I CAN see the occasional usefulness in a gyro powerful enough to create whirlwinds. But beyond that, Dax is the worst example of a comic relief Ranger I’ve ever known. He’s annoying, he’s not funny, he never undergoes any sort of character development, his whole schtick is saying that their adventures are ‘like a movie’, and he always, ALWAYS, ALWAYS says the worst thing to make a situation even WORSE. Now granted, a lot of people would probably say the same about people like Bridge or Ziggy. The thing is, both of those Rangers, while having negative character traits (Ziggy’s a bit too eager for attention, and I could seriously harm Bridge for transmitting his whole finger wiggling when he says “Buttery” to me), they’re nonetheless good, heroic individuals in their own ways, and are honestly WAY funnier than Dax could ever be. In short, to quote Linkara, “SHUT UP, DAX!

#4 - Nick Russel/Bowen, the Red Mystic Ranger

#4 – Nick Russel/Bowen, the Red Mystic Ranger

Speaking of Rangers that are quitters, let’s talk about Nick. Now, I don’t wanna pick too much, because he does have his fair share of decent moments too, but he’s shown to be a little too willing to give up more than once, which is a HUGE problem for a Red Ranger to have. Plus, he comes off as more than a little dickish in terms of how he handles the obvious romantic feelings between himself and Madison. And just the fact that he’s the only member of the core team to have any kind of personal stake or reason to be involved in the events of the season and doesn’t really grow past these character defects by the end really makes the season all the more difficult to watch. Still, because he DOES have his moments where he comes around a little and can be decently heroic when the situation requires it, he’s not exactly the worst of the worst on this list.

#5 - Jake Holling, the Megaforce Black Ranger/Super Megaforce Green Ranger

#5 – Jake Holling, the Megaforce Black Ranger/Super Megaforce Green Ranger

… … …*sighs* Okay, let’s be real here, because I know a LOT of people, older fans in particular, are not happy with the past four seasons of Power Rangers, this last one in particular. However, I need to be clear about something: The Rangers, while being incredibly bland at times, still come off as decent people and competent heroes that I would feel safe around…minus one. Jake does not come off to me as either of these things. You might THINK he is, but he’s NOT. Every single time he is engaging in Ranger duties, he is out there to get attention, namely Gia’s. His ENTIRE CHARACTER, besides liking sports and being a doofus, is built around him chasing Gia like a sad, lost puppy. Or rather, it WAS built around that, until finally he became something far worse: A frigging STALKER. Don’t believe me? Listen to this one exchange of dialogue between him and Orion:

No, I COULD pick on this entire scene and ask when the hell any of them taught Orion ANYTHING, but again, I’m keeping this limited to one Ranger per team. As such, let’s instead focus on just how frigging CREEPY that sentence was! He’s not some poor yet likable guy with a crush on someone who can’t see how kind he is, he comes off as someone who would raid Gia’s panty drawer and then chloroform her! Now, I’m going to give Azim Rizk the benefit of the doubt and assume that he either didn’t detect the horrible implications of that last sentence, or just said it out of fear of losing his job. And for that matter, I’m gonna suggest the same of the rest of them, since otherwise, they wouldn’t be portraying this scene as a bunch of assholes who allow this sick behaviour to continue. And just from a production standpoint, the decision to make him more of a clumsy doofus as time went on so that he’d match up closer to the Sentai footage used for Super Megaforce is very at odds with his athleticism. The show wants to push him as a kid who is great at sports AND as someone who would trip over every curb on Earth, except that these two things do not match. So, if you wonder why I created a sick aunt with breast cancer for him in my fanfic, besides to tie the Rangers into a situation where they’d march in a breast cancer awareness parade, the answer is very simple: Because there’s nothing I could realistically DO with the character and still have him be likable. He may not be as blatantly annoying as Dax, but he’s still one of the worst Rangers of all time.

Anyway, those are my 5 Least Favourite Rangers. Got one that wasn’t on here? Leave a comment telling me your own least favourite Power Rangers, and be sure to check back in next week when I look at the past two seasons of PR, what I would’ve done differently, what I legitimately liked, and what I hope to see in Dino Charge. Ja né!

Tales of Dumbassery – Sleepless in SPD

Why can I NEVER seem to stop myself from saying the dumbest things on the planet? WHY??? O_O

Also, in case you’re wondering, THIS is LinearRanger’s show:

http://blip.tv/linearranger

…Ja né!