Saturday Night’s Alright for Fighting – JVPW, My New Wrestling E-Fed

…Yup, I’m really doing this, folks. lol

In two days, I will release all three parts of JVPW Episode 1 of my wrestling e-fed, created using Fire Pro Wrestling World on Steam. In Episode 1, you will see such talent as AJ Styles, Chris Jericho, Asuka, Kenny Omega, Rosemary, and more get it on in Fire Pro. I’ll be sure to post links to the videos here on my blog once they’re up. Also, I might as well let everybody know that, in Episode 2, I will have not one but two 8-Person Battle Royals to determine who will face each other in the main event of that show for the JVPW Heavyweight Championship. And who will be in those matches? Well, I’m leaving that mostly up to you all. All you have to do is list off some of your favourite wrestlers in the comments below, and I will take them all under consideration. There are only the following restrictions:

1. They have to have a Create A Wrestler made of them for Fire Pro on Steam.
2. No dead people. Even if I’m not making money off doing this, I don’t want to feel like I’m reaping the benefits of the deceased. Just makes me uncomfortable.
3. While I’m not planning to be too much of a stickler for who is and is not retired, I will not be having Shawn Michaels compete on my show, as he is the only person nowadays who seems to be trying to make his retirement from in-ring competition actually stick. He WILL, however, be one of the referees on the show, along with Renee Young and Senior Benjamin…because I had to get them on the show somehow. lol
4. No Sexy Star. If you know anything about what happened between her and Rosemary last year, you should understand exactly why she won’t appear on my show, and why I personally believe she should be blackballed from wrestling in North America for the rest of her natural life.

Anyway, lemme know what you think of this project of mine, who you’d like to see make appearances, and be sure to check in Saturday night for the first episode. Play us out, Nickelback!… … …What? I like their cover of this song, okay? Leave me alone. XD

 

 

 

 

 

…Oh, fine! Here’s one last reveal regarding one of the guys wrestling in Episode 1!

Braun Strowman Pushed Over An Ambulance – Why It Was AWESOME!

…Show it again. lol

Now the audience’s reaction.

Honest to God, at this point, I don’t even care if Roman Reigns goes over Braun Strowman the next time they wrestle. Braun is a made man after this. And if you think that mister Mohit Gaur, who recorded that last video, sounded like he was having an orgasm while watching, imagine what Vince #ILoveBigMuscles McMahon was like backstage. A friend of mine said it was likely a matter of “Oop, my hand is in my pants again”, to which I responded “Fuck his pants! His pants were probably flung to the other side of the gorilla position while he had both hands firmly clasped around his dick and hosed all over Michael Cole and JBL!”…Okay, I MAY have added some of that for this article, but the point still stands! Like, you remember that thing Triple H said about Vince and Cocky years ago? That was what was going on backstage while all that was going on! And honestly, I feel like the whole sequence of the beatdown and Strowman pushing over the ambulance should’ve been the last thing we saw on the show, because who the fuck could care about the draft (oh sorry, Superstar Shakeup) after THAT?!

Now, here’s why I wanted to talk about this, besides telling sick-minded jokes about Vinny Mac: A lot of people, in response to this, have pointed out all of the ways this was complete bullshit. Specifically, how that was clearly not the real Roman Reigns on the stretcher when Strowman Zack-Ryder’d him, and that there was no way on God’s green Earth that Braun Strowman pushed over a 10,000+ pound vehicle. And yes, one person in particular would be King Ross, and no, none of what I’m about to say is meant to be a sleight against him. In fact, I was laughing my ass off at his dissection of this whole sequence of events. To be blunt, I don’t think I even need to direct what I’m about to say to him, since he probably already knows and was just doing this for the sake of entertainment. But I’ll say it anyway: I’m well aware of the fact that this was stupid and fake as shit. Here’s the thing I need to make clear, though: I still loved it. I still thought it was awesome. The fact that it was fake didn’t influence my thoughts on it at all. As long as something is so outrageous and eye-popping that you physically want NEED to go on social media, not only to say your own piece about it but to see what everyone else thought, it accomplished its goals. And really, isn’t that exactly what wrestling is? Something that is obviously fake and kind of stupid but you watch anyway for how over-the-top insane and awesome it can be?

But hey, that’s just my take on it. Feel free to let me know what you thought. Ja né!

Who Is Really To Blame For The Divas Revolution Failing? + The Difference Between NXT and RAW

So, something that had the online wrestling community buzzing was the fact that, following a match last week on RAW involving the Divas, several of them went online and posted rather angry tweets at the fans who basically dumped all over the match. They talked about how they didn’t care about the Divas Revolution, how they’re trying to do be stars and no one cares, etc. Now, I know for a fact that at least one of them, Paige, almost immediately took her tweet down. One theory as to why that is is because she realized that antagonizing the fans right back would just encourage that to happen again in the next city they wrestled in. However, I’m willing to give her the benefit of the doubt and suggest that maybe she realized that she was just yelling out of anger and didn’t think what she was writing out all that well when she did it.

If you don’t know what I mean, allow me to explain: RAW last week was filmed from the Barclays Centre in Brooklyn, New York. Why is that relevant? Because that’s where they filmed SummerSlam, and more importantly to this case, NXT TakeOver, and it was the same crowd at all three shows. And, at NXT TakeOver, there was a match between Sasha Banks and Bayley that was arguably one of the best matches all weekend. Personally, I think it was the best in terms of action, drama, build-up, resolution, and so on, but I’m willing to say that others MIGHT be better, but that it was at least in the Top 3 or 5. Regardless, it was built like a Goddamn main event, and the crowd appreciated and responded to it as such. So to say that the crowd doesn’t care for the women in WWE is bullcrap, because they LOVED that match.

So, if that’s the case, why did they seem to not care about the match on RAW? Because it wasn’t very good. The action wasn’t that good, there was little to no build-up, and in the promo that took place beforehand, we were basically told that wins and losses don’t mean anything, so the crowd didn’t care who won. So why would you be surprised that the crowd didn’t care? They weren’t given any reason to care. If they don’t have a reason to care, they’re gonna dump on a match, and especially when you’re in a ruckus crowd like they had in Brooklyn. That’s just how it is.

In the wake of this, it’s been brought up on a number of different wrestling podcasts and news articles that the reason the Divas Revolution is failing on RAW has nothing to do with the women involved, and it has nothing to do with the fans. And frankly, I tend to agree with what they’ve determined based on my own recollections and opinions. The problem is what it’s always been, and with the popularity that NXT has gotten, and a lot of people watching that show and comparing it to RAW, and seeing the same talent appear on both shows and taking note of what’s different with the exact same people on the two different shows, it’s more clear than it’s ever been what the problem is: The problem is Vince McMahon. And I’m aware of the fact that we wouldn’t even have a WWE if it weren’t for Vince, I am not taking anything away from his success, but the man needs to stop. He needs to stop coming to every RAW and personally mandating how it goes every single night. He needs to let Triple H and Stephanie run the show, and honestly, the fact that I can say that and mean it says a lot about how things are different nowadays. lol But regardless, one thing is clear: Triple H and Stephanie know how to run a wrestling show in 2015. Vince McMahon doesn’t. And if you don’t understand how that is, allow me to demonstrate, and remember that Vince has the final say of everything on RAW, and rarely if ever even watches NXT:

• On NXT, women are given actual time to wrestle, are built like athletes, and have their own unique stories that are told. On RAW, the Divas Revolution is the story, not the individuals in it, they aren’t given time to wrestle, they don’t have their own stories, and we’re constantly told how we’re in the middle of a revolution of women in sports, even though women in sports have been awesome for a LONG time now.
• On NXT, titles mean something. They are prizes with an incredible honour attached to them that are not passed around to anyone on the roster from any given point in time. When you win one, it shows you busted your ass to obtain it and have an important role in the brand’s history. On RAW, damned near everyone on the roster has won a title. The championships no longer hold value because they’ve been passed around like a game of hot potato, and in fact, there has existed for a decade now a method of gaining a title shot anytime you want, making the list of people that have won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship (and the two belts merged to create it) even larger. And speaking of the titles, the NXT Women’s Title looks like something you’d be proud to display in your living room (although I don’t know why it’s silver. Title belts should really be gold in my opinion), and the WWE Divas’ Title looks like something you’d display in your room as a trophy you won as a child (it’s a frigging BUTTERFLY!!!).
• On NXT, everyone working the show has their own story that’s being told with as much care as can be given. On RAW, the only people that are given any REAL care are John Cena and whoever the next person is to wrestle him. And that’s not even a knock against John Cena. Hell, I actually feel BAD for him sometimes, because he’s the one that gets knocked on for that, when it’s Vince that ultimately decides to keep pushing him as the top guy, whether he has the belt or not. I guess Brock gets some care too, but not nearly as much, which is a shame, because, let’s be honest, for better or worse, he’s the most over guy on RAW right now. Him and Paul Heyman, who seriously needs to be put in the Hall of Fame one of these days.
• This is probably the most bizarre of all, and continues to baffle the frak outta me, but in a way that actually makes me laugh. On RAW, Triple H and Stephanie are the top villains. You would THINK that Seth Rollins is the top villain, because he’s the champion, but because those two are running the show and constantly helping him, all the while talking down all the good guys and saying that they don’t need them to survive, they’re the top heels. On NXT, they could not possibly get more over as good guys. They give the fans what they want, they help build up the big match-ups, Stephanie is always putting over the women on the show, they can pretty much do no wrong.

So, that’s my take on the difference between RAW and NXT, and why the Divas Revolution is failing. Agree or disagree? Lemme know in the comments, and we’ll see if anything changes in the near future. Ja né!

Craig Photobombed Green Arrow And Stardust

…Huh.

Didn’t even notice that was Craig from The Bryan & Vinny Show. Dunno how I managed that, but I honestly didn’t notice…I’m so jealous of him now. Not only was he seen on RAW, he got to fuck over Kevin Dunn. XD

PPV Idea – NXT TakeOver: Wrestlemania

I don’t usually do this, but I had a great idea for a show that NXT should do, and felt like sharing. I have my doubts that WWE will ever do this, but they should really consider it. Picture this: NXT TakeOver: WrestleMania. No, Vince, I don’t mean them actually taking over WrestleMania, don’t throw your pacemaker outta whack. Rather, an NXT special that airs the night before at the same arena, so you’ve got NXT on Saturday, WrestleMania on Sunday, and RAW on Monday. In fact, considering how huge next year’s ‘Mania will be, in terms of attendance, might be the best time for it.

As for matches…well, keep in mind, a lot of this is subject to change based on if these people will all be available, who is holding what belts, and ignoring what potential plans WWE has in mind. It’s just ideas off the top of my head right here and now. Basically, I’d want it to more or less be a big reunion show of everyone that made it big in WWE that came up through NXT. Guys like Dean Ambrose, Cesaro, Neville, the Lucha Dragons, the Ascension, Kevin Owens, and so on, and have them wrestle with the top names in NXT right now, like Finn Bálor, The Vaudevillains, Samoa Joe, Sami Zayn, Blake and Murphy, Tyler Breeze, and Hideo Itami. As such, here’s a few ideas for matches they could do (note, some competitors in these matches overlap).

• One Last Time, 2 out of 3 Falls: Cesaro vs Sami Zayn.
• Spear vs Gore: Roman Reigns vs Rhyno
• NXT Tag Team Championship 4-Way Elimination Match: Blake and Murphy (c) vs The Lucha Dragons vs The Ascension vs The Vaudevillains
• #1 Contender Ladder Match: Paige vs Bayley vs Emma vs Dana Brooke vs Eva Marie
• Samoa Joe vs Kevin Owens
• One Time Only Reunion: The Wyatt Family vs The Shield
• Cesaro vs Samoa Joe
• Neville vs Kevin Owens
• Sami Zayn vs Daniel Bryan
• NXT Women’s Championship Ultimate Submission Match: Sasha Banks (c) vs Charlotte
• NXT Championship: Finn Bálor (c) vs Hideo Itami, w/ William Regal as Special Guest Referree

Anyway, that’s all I had in mind. What would you guys like to see for a big WrestleMania-esque NXT show? Lemme know in the comments section below, and we’ll see if WWE takes notice. Ja né!

 

 

 

…Oh, and while I’m making wishes, this should totally be the intro for NXT. XD

My Thoughts On RAW Last Night And The Current Main Event Picture In WWE

Y’know, I haven’t really talked much about wrestling on here in a LONG time, but there’s something I gotta get off my chest about last night’s show, and the WWE main event picture. If you didn’t see last night’s RAW, here’s what happened: It was revealed that Seth Rollins passed along the idea to Triple H to make John Cena vs. Randy Orton (or as Spoony likes to call it, “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”) at Hell In A Cell a #1 Contender Match. In other words, the winner takes on Brock Lesnar, presumably at Survivor Series, for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Of course, the reason is obvious: Rollins wants Lesnar and his opponent to beat the hell outta each other and so he can cash in his Money In The Bank contract and win the belt the easy way.

Regardless, at the end of the night, we had John Cena and Dean Ambrose vs. Randy Orton, Kane, and Seth Rollins in a Handicap Tag Team Street Fight. I don’t know why there’s tagging in a Street Fight, but whatever. The point is, about two thirds of the way into the match, Kane ordered the Hell In A Cell, which had been hung in the air all night, to be lowered, effectively making it a Handicap Tag Team Hell In A Cell Match. The end result is that these five guys beat the piss outta each other with chairs, tables, and Singapore Canes, and the match ended with Orton hitting the RKO on Ambrose for the win, only to get Curb Stomped by Rollins before he had a chance to celebrate. Hell, he got hit before the announcer could even say his name. And so, the show ended with Rollins on top of the Hell In A Cell celebrating atop the bodies laying in the ring.

So, a couple of thoughts. First off, I’m kinda confused as to why we’re getting two Hell In A Cell matches at the show on Sunday, when we coulda just thrown Brock Lesnar in with these five guys and make it a 6-Man Hell In A Cell Match for the title. Heck, one of those matches scheduled for Sunday is one we’ve already seen before, and is a match including two men that have literally wrestled each other at LEAST a hundred times on live TV (not sure about non-televised shows, so the number could actually be several times that amount). Now, my guess is that Brock’s agreed-upon schedule keeps him from being used every show. And I KNEW that was gonna happen. In fact, it was my one concern with putting the belt on him. Now, I understand that Brock is still not used to a regular schedule, and I of course can accept him not showing up every week on RAW…But when you are the WWE Heavyweight Champion of the World, when you are the face of said company, you have a certain responsibility to represent it at every Pay-Per-View! This is why Daniel Bryan was stripped of the belt: He couldn’t uphold said responsibilities and obligations due to injury, so he had to forfeit the title. And by the way, if this match DOES in fact take place at Survivor Series? Guess how long that is since his last title defense at Night of Champions? Almost exactly two months! So I don’t wanna hear the ’30 day mandatory title defense clause’ EVER brought up again!

…*sighs* Okay, better now. Anyway, the other thought that occurs to me after checking out the aforementioned Spoony One’s Twitter today is…why is John Cena being rewarded with the possibility of becoming #1 Contender, when he lost the Contract On A Pole Match against Ambrose to determine which of them fought Seth Rollins at Hell In A Cell? Why isn’t Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins to determine the #1 Contender? Now, I already gave the in-story explanation, which fits the character Seth Rollins is portraying currently: He’s the clever coward, always looking to take the easy way out of situations. However, the problem is that the audience now needs to sit through Cena vs. Orton Part God-Knows-What to determine who takes on Brock, and that match will either be Brock vs. Cena for the third time this year, or a Hell vs. Heel match for the championship. And unless the plan is to turn Randy Orton face, which has been historically proven to be a bad idea at least twice that I know of, and have him win the belt, only for Rollins to come in and steal it from him, it’s probably gonna be Cena beating Brock to win the title for the 16th time (which means he ties Ric Flair, which should just not happen, but you know they’ll do it), only to have the belt taken from him by Rollins.

Anyway, where does this leave us for the main event picture? Well, we know that Seth Rollins will eventually gain the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. That’s a given. The question is, where do we go from there? The theory is that Daniel Bryan, body willing, will get his shot to get the belt back at Wrestlemania. And really, Rollins vs. Bryan? AWESOME main event. Otherwise, the other major contenders are Dean Ambrose, John Cena, and Roman Reigns. And my guess is that Brock Lesnar will probably fight one of the men not chosen to fight Seth Rollins, which is another reason why I hope Daniel Bryan is the man to take on the champ, because he’s NOT beating Brock. I’m sorry, I like Daniel Bryan a lot, but look at what both he and Brock bring to the ring. They both have a very similar style, except Brock is a LOT bigger, and Daniel Bryan is maybe a LITTLE faster. Also, I would NOT want to put a guy fresh off a career-threatening-injury against Brock Lesnar first thing, ‘cuz Lesnar might just fucking kill him. O_O

So yeah, those are my thoughts on RAW last night, and the current title picture for the foreseeable future. Leave a comment below what you think about this, as well as your own conclusions, and we’ll see what becomes of the title picture by Survivor Series.

Jyger The Mark – Elimination Chamber Predictions

Well, time for another WWE PPV, which means time for my predictions. Let’s not waste any time and dive into the first match predictions.

World Heavyweight Championship Elimination Chamber Match: Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Wade Barrett vs. Santino Marella vs. The Big Show vs. Cody Rhodes vs. The Great Khali

Well, if you saw my previous Jyger The Mark entry, you know how I feel about SOMEBODY in this match. Since I’ve already had my VERY angry rant about him though, I’ll opt not to talk about that again here. Instead, I’d like to point out, obvious that this is, that this is Daniel Bryan’s biggest challenge to date as far as defending his title. Should he win, he’ll move on to WrestleMania as the champion. And frankly, that’s what I’d like to see happen, for him to win this match and face Sheamus at WrestleMania, especially since the last time they were to fight at ‘Mania, it ended up becoming a Dark Match (non-televised match), which I felt was a slap in the face of all their hard work.

Predicted Winner: Daniel Bryan

Divas Championship: Beth Phoenix (c) vs. Tamina Snuka

Surprisingly enough, I am actually kinda interested in this match. I wanna see how these two match up in a one-on-one match where the belt is on the line. I’m thinking what will happen is that Beth wins, continuing the story wherein she claims there are no legit contenders for the title, which will likely lead to a match between her and Kharma when she comes back from maternity leave.

Predicted Winner: Beth Phoenix

Ambulance Match: Kane vs. John Cena

A love triangle blossoming? Has John Cena embraced the hate? Will Kane emerge victorious, or will his own evil deeds be returned in kind? Has Zack Ryder officially become a Jackass stuntman? And can this scenario become any more like a soap opera?…Okay, seriously though, how much you wanna bet that Eve was in on this the whole time, that she was working with Kane? Wouldn’t surprise me one bit. Anyway, much as I don’t wanna go against Kane, Cena needs momentum going into WrestleMania, so I’m gonna say Cena for the win.

Predicted Winner: John Cena

WWE Championship Elimination Chamber Match: CM Punk (c) vs. Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz vs. R-Truth vs. Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler

…I find myself in an odd position with this match in that, honestly, I don’t really care so much as how this match goes as how the fallout goes. Basically, regardless of who wins this match, I see four of the six going back to business as usual, while the other two BETTER be having a match at WrestleMania. But since I HAVE to make a prediction, I’m gonna say Chris Jericho to somehow take the belt away from CM Punk, leading to a match between them at WrestleMania. Either way though, if WWE has any sense at all, and I feel that this is what they are going for anyway, they will set up CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho at WrestleMania, which would in my opinion steal the f-ing show. So why Jericho to win instead of Punk? Well, basically because I think if the belt is involved in their feud, Punk would operate better going into ‘Mania as the hunter, not the hunted.

Predicted Winner: Chris Jericho

Well, that’s all from me. Enjoy the show tonight, and hopefully I’ll be able to cover the results tomorrow. Ja ne!

Jyger’s Rant – Santino is in the Chamber

Told ya more content was coming soon. Oh, and if you think I went nuts during my last video, just wait…

Oh, and in related news, expect written predictions for this Sunday’s Elimination Chamber PPV in the next day or so.

Jyger The Mark’s Ramblings – Royal Rumble Aftermath

Okay, so the Royal Rumble has come and gone, so now’s as good enough a time to look and see how I did in my predictions, as well as talk about some of the highlights from the show.

Since the show started with the Steel Cage Match, I’ll start off there. So yeah, pretty much like I thought it would go, with the three of them laying some pretty good beatings on one another, but ultimately Daniel Bryan managed to slip away with the win…quite literally, actually, since Big Show had him in a death grip above the ring and Bryan slipped out of his grasp to fall to the floor below, thus getting the win.

Daniel Bryan Wins

Afterwards, there was a bonus match: An 8-Diva Tag Match. I didn’t really care much for it. Don’t get me wrong, I like Natalya and Beth Phoenix, and I guess Kelly Kelly and Eve are alright, but…well, I guess I’ll just say it: Will somebody please tell me why the hell Alicia Fox got a match on a PPV? She is one of the worst piece of shit wrestlers I have ever seen in my life. Anyway, not much to say, Team Phoenix got the win.

So my reasoning behind Kane winning his match by DQ was simple: Cena needed momentum going into his match with The Rock, and Kane shouldn’t have lost his first big match back. I figured, how else could they pull this off? Well apparently, there was one way that I didn’t think of: A double count-out. Oh, and when it was over, Kane beat the crap outta Cena, got ahold of the already injured (on-screen that is) Zack Ryder, and gave him a Tombstone Piledriver just for fun. So yeah, should be interesting to see where this goes.

After that, I’m pretty sure there was a match between Drew McIntyre and Brutus Clay…At least I think there was. As soon as I saw Brutus come out and start dancing, I retreated into the dark recesses of my mind. Anyway, double checking on Wrestleview.com showed me that Brutus won with the…err, “What The Funk” Body Splash?…Okay…

Brutus Clay Wins

CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler was again what I expected…with a slight twist, in that John Laurinaitis assigned a different in-ring referee and he essentially became the Special Enforcer/back-up referee. Punk and Ziggles (no I didn’t misspell it, that’s just what I call him sometimes) put on a good show, as I figured they would. I just hope that next time Ziggler gets a shot at the title, the story has more to do with him and not the guy officiating. Anyway, CM Punk wins with Laurinaitis getting in the ring to count along with the ref, continuing the current angle of him trying to suck up to everyone so that he’ll keep his job.

Finally, we came to the Royal Rumble. Before I get to the winner, lemme talk about some of my favourite moments from this Rumble…

Mr. Socko vs. The Cobra

As I’ve made clear to people I talk to about wrestling, I really can’t stand Santino. I find him to be a waste of money, especially when you consider that the only reason he ever got a job with WWE is that he gave them a reason to fire Jim Cornette. However I will note that he usually gives some HILARIOUS moments at the Rumble, and this year was no different as he and Mick Foley had a stand off, resulting in them pulling out Mr. Socko and The Cobra. Yeah, forget Cena vs. Rock, forget Hogan vs. Andre, Mr. Socko vs. The Cobra could totally headline Wrestlemania.

Superstars Return

Oh, we had some good ones this year. Not including Chris Jericho and Mick Foley, since we knew they’d be in already, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, The Great Khali, and even Kharma all returned to take a crack at winning the Rumble.

Kofi Kingston's Handstand

I honestly didn’t think anyone could ever beat John Morrison’s use of parkour to avoid elimination, and then I saw THAT. I should definitely make a list of some of the most eye-popping moments in the Rumble, but for now, let us just say that ranks pretty high.

All Three Announcers Enter

Yep, believe it or not, all three announcers entered the Royal Rumble this year, all the while I was laughing my ass off. And believe it or not, Michael Cole actually lasted longer than The King before…well, remember how I talked about those returns?

If I could, I would make that my screen saver. Seriously, that one move should award her a Slammy.

Anyway, on to the actual winner. You’ll recall I originally picked Chris Jericho, Sheamus, Randy Orton, or Wade Barrett to possibly win the Rumble. And as it turned out, three out of those four made it to the final four of the Rumble, with Jericho, Orton, and Sheamus staring each other and the 30th Entrant, The Big Show, down. Big Show was surprisingly the first of the four to go out, being eliminated by Orton, but then Jericho quickly tossed Orton out as well. After a LONG back and forth fight between Jericho and Sheamus, with multiple near-eliminations between the two, it finally ended with one good kick to the face of Chris Jericho, knocking him from the apron to the floor below, thus awarding Sheamus the victory as he will now move on to challenge the champion of his choosing in the main event at Wrestlemania.

Sheamus Wins

Well, that’s all from me. Hope you all enjoyed the Rumble as much as I did.

Jyger The Mark’s Ramblings – The Royal Rumble

So, I’m going to the Royal Rumble tonight. I generally don’t go to PPVs that often because they’re flipping expensive, but I generally try to go to the Royal Rumble because it’s my favourite since the Royal Rumble match itself pretty much stands for everything that I like about wrestling: Chaotic entertainment that is VERY hard to predict the outcome of. While I’m likely gonna be doing another blog entry where I talk about the results tomorrow (hopefully), I just wanted to make a few predictions on the show first.

WWE Championship: CM Punk (c) vs Dolph Ziggler

I feel really, really bad for Dolph Ziggler going into this match, and I will tell you why: Because the plot going into this match, the main story arc that this match is a part of, has NOTHING to do with Dolph Ziggler. This story is about CM Punk and John Laurinaitis. Ziggler is basically there to be the challenger, nothing more, nothing less. And it’s sad because I think him and Punk could have a great rivalry, but this is not about a rivalry between the two of them. They’ve even gone so far as to eliminate the possibility of Ziggler beating Punk for the title, it’s more a question of whether or not Laurinaitis will screw Punk out of the championship, and that’s kinda sad. Still, I expect these two to put on a hell of a match, and really, that’s the most important part, right?

Predicted Winner: CM Punk

Kane vs. John Cena

No, you know what, before I get to the match, I need to address something that I think a lot of people have been ragging on: Kane’s new attire. Watching videos on YouTube of Kane’s return, I’ve seen commenters (which spell checker says is not a real word btw) say that his new look is ridiculous. I have the following reply to such: WHY DO YOU CARE?! Have you actually been watching what he’s been doing since coming back?! He coulda come back dressed like Doink The Clown and I wouldn’t have cared, because the only thing that matters is that when you are standing across the ring from this Kane, you better fight for your life or he might just take it from you. PERIOD!

Anyway, as far as the match goes, I suspect that Kane will win via DQ, with Cena finally snapping as a result of Kane breaking his friend Zack Ryder’s back and will finally embrace the hate. The hate for Kane. What happens afterwards is anyone’s guess.

Predicted Winner: Kane via DQ

World Heavyweight Championship Steel Cage Match: Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

I find what they’re doing with Daniel Bryan to be kind of intriguing. He hasn’t REALLY turned full heel YET, but you kinda feel like he’s going to. Surprisingly though, I actually find Mark Henry’s current persona going into this match as being the one I like most: The one that doesn’t care about the girl in the hospital and if she really forgives Big Show for accidentally tackling her or not, and not caring about who is on the level about what they say. He’s just coming to kick some ass and get his belt back. So between the animosity between Big Show and Daniel Bryan and Mark Henry’s intent to get his belt back, EXPECT EXTREME BRUTALITY.

Predicted Winner: Daniel Bryan via Escape

The Royal Rumble Match

This is one where I simply do not have one predicted winner, but that’s good because this is a match where I just like to sit back and see what happens and make predictions on the fly. The only thing I know for certain is that The Miz will be entering at #1, making him the least likely individual to win, but then stranger things have happened at the Rumble, which is what makes it so fun. Oh, and I know this much too: If Santino Marella wins the Rumble (because he came very close last year), I will protest. BIG TIME.

Possible Winners: Chris Jericho, Sheamus, Randy Orton, Wade Barret

…Anyway, that’s all from me, and I guess I’ll see what happens in a few hours.