Jyger The Mark’s Ramblings – The Royal Rumble

So, I’m going to the Royal Rumble tonight. I generally don’t go to PPVs that often because they’re flipping expensive, but I generally try to go to the Royal Rumble because it’s my favourite since the Royal Rumble match itself pretty much stands for everything that I like about wrestling: Chaotic entertainment that is VERY hard to predict the outcome of. While I’m likely gonna be doing another blog entry where I talk about the results tomorrow (hopefully), I just wanted to make a few predictions on the show first.

WWE Championship: CM Punk (c) vs Dolph Ziggler

I feel really, really bad for Dolph Ziggler going into this match, and I will tell you why: Because the plot going into this match, the main story arc that this match is a part of, has NOTHING to do with Dolph Ziggler. This story is about CM Punk and John Laurinaitis. Ziggler is basically there to be the challenger, nothing more, nothing less. And it’s sad because I think him and Punk could have a great rivalry, but this is not about a rivalry between the two of them. They’ve even gone so far as to eliminate the possibility of Ziggler beating Punk for the title, it’s more a question of whether or not Laurinaitis will screw Punk out of the championship, and that’s kinda sad. Still, I expect these two to put on a hell of a match, and really, that’s the most important part, right?

Predicted Winner: CM Punk

Kane vs. John Cena

No, you know what, before I get to the match, I need to address something that I think a lot of people have been ragging on: Kane’s new attire. Watching videos on YouTube of Kane’s return, I’ve seen commenters (which spell checker says is not a real word btw) say that his new look is ridiculous. I have the following reply to such: WHY DO YOU CARE?! Have you actually been watching what he’s been doing since coming back?! He coulda come back dressed like Doink The Clown and I wouldn’t have cared, because the only thing that matters is that when you are standing across the ring from this Kane, you better fight for your life or he might just take it from you. PERIOD!

Anyway, as far as the match goes, I suspect that Kane will win via DQ, with Cena finally snapping as a result of Kane breaking his friend Zack Ryder’s back and will finally embrace the hate. The hate for Kane. What happens afterwards is anyone’s guess.

Predicted Winner: Kane via DQ

World Heavyweight Championship Steel Cage Match: Daniel Bryan (c) vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

I find what they’re doing with Daniel Bryan to be kind of intriguing. He hasn’t REALLY turned full heel YET, but you kinda feel like he’s going to. Surprisingly though, I actually find Mark Henry’s current persona going into this match as being the one I like most: The one that doesn’t care about the girl in the hospital and if she really forgives Big Show for accidentally tackling her or not, and not caring about who is on the level about what they say. He’s just coming to kick some ass and get his belt back. So between the animosity between Big Show and Daniel Bryan and Mark Henry’s intent to get his belt back, EXPECT EXTREME BRUTALITY.

Predicted Winner: Daniel Bryan via Escape

The Royal Rumble Match

This is one where I simply do not have one predicted winner, but that’s good because this is a match where I just like to sit back and see what happens and make predictions on the fly. The only thing I know for certain is that The Miz will be entering at #1, making him the least likely individual to win, but then stranger things have happened at the Rumble, which is what makes it so fun. Oh, and I know this much too: If Santino Marella wins the Rumble (because he came very close last year), I will protest. BIG TIME.

Possible Winners: Chris Jericho, Sheamus, Randy Orton, Wade Barret

…Anyway, that’s all from me, and I guess I’ll see what happens in a few hours.