Spider-Gwen Lyrics (AKA Gwen Stacy: The Insert-Cool-Sounding-Adjective-Here Spider-Woman)

 

Spider-Gwen, Spider-Gwen,
Does it better than Spider-Men.
Spins a web, to and fro,
Nothing like this white widow.
Look out!
Here comes the Spider-Gwen!

Is she strong? Listen bud,
She’s got radioactive blood.
It’s a gift and a curse,
Spinning out of Spider-Verse.
Hey, there!
There goes the Spider-Gwen!

In the chill of night,
At the scene of a crime,
Like a streak of light,
She arrives just in time!

Spider-Gwen, Spider-Gwen,
Friendly neighborhood Spider-Gwen. 
There is nothing you must fear,
Insert-Cool-Adjective-Here.
To her, life is a great big bang up.
Wherever there’s a hang up,
You’ll find the Spider-Gwen!

10 Favourite Marvel Superheroes REVISED + A Thank You To My Readers

…Before I start, I have to give a HUGE thank you to everyone who checks out my blog. Not only did I break my former record for most views in a single day on my blog Thursday (the old record was 441), but just yesterday, the record was broken yet again with a total of 624! I could not have, in my wildest dreams, imagined that being a thing. So, to all of my readers, supporters, friends, and family, thank you all very much, and please continue to read my blog. Also, be sure to leave your own thoughts and comments on my articles as well. Really helps to know that people care about my stuff. ^_^

Anyway, a couple of years ago on my birthday, I made a list of my favourite Marvel superheroes. Well, two years later, looking back on that list, I find myself having some highly different opinions. Maybe it’s because I’m a lot more into Marvel Comics than I was back then, the addition of new characters, or just the continuing detriment of certain older heroes *COUGH!*PETEANDTONY*COUGH!*, but for whatever reason, I can’t honestly say that my top ten heroes of the Marvel Universe are the same as they were before. So, with that in mind, let’s take a look at my revised 10 Favourite Marvel Superheroes, starting with probably the most obvious…

#1 – Kamala Khan, AKA Ms. Marvel

Yeah, not exactly shocking anybody with this pick, huh? lol Can’t help it, guys. This is a character who, in less than two years, has become as important to me as Stephanie Brown, maybe even more-so in the grand scheme of things. She’s a geek, she’s a minority heroine, she’s the protector of New Jersey, and now, she’s a Goddamn Avenger. She’s earned the respect and recognition of Wolverine, the Amazing Spider-Man, Medusa, and most importantly, her predecessor and personal hero, Carol Danvers. There’s no limit to how high this character can go, and frankly, I’m just excited to be part of the ride. 🙂

#2 – Steve Rogers, AKA Captain America

As I’ve stated before, even as a proud Canadian, I love Captain America. Admittedly, though, this is mostly based on his appearances in the movies. In the comics, some of his exploits are a bit tainted due to repeatedly faking his own death and, more recently, becoming more concerned with bringing in Tony Stark for personally betraying him, instead of being focused on saving the world. Still, in both versions, there’s plenty about him to be inspired by. This is a guy who had damned near everything working against him in becoming a soldier, but fought tooth and nail to fight for his country and uphold ideals like peace, freedom, and justice anyway, to the point where his dedication made him the prime candidate to become Captain America. And despite beliefs that everything special about him came out of a bottle, really, that’s not true. He’s not just a lab experiment. Really, the better comparison is that he’s like a Power Ranger: The powers are just a tool for stopping evil. It’s the person using them that make them special.

#3 – James ‘Logan’ Howlett, AKA Wolverine

ADAMANTIUM RAGE!!! 😛 What is it with badass berserker heroes with tragic back-stories repeatedly cropping up in everything I read, write, watch, and play? Logan, Raiden from Metal Gear, Guts from Berserk, and so on. But hey, they are successful as characters, and Logan is no exception. The biggest problem with Wolverine is how near-impossible it is for him to die. Kinda hurts the overall drama of some of his stories, since you know he’s damned near always gonna come out of situations without a scratch on him. Granted, as anyone who has watched the DEATH BATTLE between him and Raiden knows, don’t mean he’s ALWAYS gonna be okay. I just really hope that, when Old Man Logan takes his place in November, he doesn’t have the same near-invincibility.

#4 – Carol Danvers, AKA Captain Marvel

Captain Marvel, she’s our hero, gonna take the villains down to ze-Wait, did I already do this joke? 😛 Anyway, I cannot believe I was not a Carol Danvers fan when I first wrote the 10 Favourite Marvel Superheroes. I can’t imagine a time anymore where I didn’t think she was awesome. And I have to give a huge thank you to Kelly Sue DeConnick for showing me just how amazing this character is. You will be greatly missed as the writer of her book going into the All-New, All-Different Marvel. Carol Corps 4 Life.

#5 – Jennifer Walters, AKA She-Hulk

As I’ve stated before, take the Hulk, slim him down a bit, make him a brilliant lawyer, a bit more in control of himself, way more compassionate for people, and a gorgeous woman. The result is She-Hulk, and for those reasons I stated, I can’t help but prefer her to her more famous cousin. And frankly, I can’t think of anyone better suited to be the leader of the A-Force, and am so glad to see that the core six members of the team in Secret Wars will all be sticking together in the new Marvel Universe.

#6 – Prince Odinson, AKA Thor

Whosoever lifts this hammer, if they be worthy, shall possess the power of Thor. And hoo boy, does this guy know how to use that power effectively. 😛 Mind you, he doesn’t have it anymore. And no disrespect to his successor, of course. I have no problem with Jane Foster, just the writing in how this whole scenario is playing itself out. Regardless, I find myself liking this Thor just the tiniest bit more. But hey, who knows what the future holds, right? I just hope they can find a way to appease fans of both Thors, ‘cuz so far, it ain’t happening.

#7 – Gwen Stacy, AKA Spider-Woman

I don’t know what exactly it is about this interpretation of the character, but I honestly think this version of Gwen Stacy is my favourite of all the now-officially-named Web Warriors. She’s badass, geeky, clever, and creative. She takes so much of what makes Peter Parker’s story work while still being fresh and new. What else can you say but…

Spider-Gwen, Spider-Gwen
Does it better than Spider-Men
Spins her threads to and fro
Nothin’ like this white widow
Look out! Here comes the Spider-Gwen

#8 – Wade Wilson, AKA Deadpool

Yeah, ’bout time he got to me! I mean, I’m ME! Why waste time with the rest of these guys?! Fuck, I’ve been back from the grave more times than Wolverine, I’m the newest member of the Uncanny Avengers, and hey, I’ve got a movie coming out! No way I wouldn’t be on here after all that! After all, we all know ol’ Jygie likes to suck up to people in the spotlight!

Stop writing my articles, WADE!

Jeez, relax, JEFFERY! Getting kinda grumpy since you turned 30, huh? What, didn’t think you’d still be living with your parents this late into life?

Ugh, moving on!…

#9 – Anna Marie, AKA Rogue

One of the best damned X-Men of all time, and a founding member of the Uncanny Avengers. Rogue is the classy southern belle who melts the hearts of men and women alike. However, piss her off, and not only is she more than capable of kicking your ass, but just touching you is enough to send you to the hospital. In other words, stay on her good side at all time.

You’re tellin’ me! I used to date her for a while, until she touched me, and left me aching for weeks. And not in the GOOD way, either…

GODDAMMIT, WADE!

#10 – Natasha Romanoff, AKA Black Widow

I know for a fact that I’ve said this at least a hundred times, but I will continue to say it until it is no longer true: WHY THE HELL DOESN’T BLACK WIDOW HAVE HER OWN MOVIE?! Let’s look at her track record in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, shall we? She stole the show in Iron Man 2 (not that there was much of a show to steal, mind you), she stole Avengers, The Winter Soldier, and even Age of Ultron, where she was put in an out-of-nowhere relationship with Bruce and presented as someone who considers herself a monster, not for being an assassin but because she couldn’t have kids. Not to mention, her most recent solo series was basically a James Bond flick set in the Marvel Universe, and we all know how successful those movies have been. There is not a single character in the MCU that hasn’t had their own movie that deserves it more than Black Widow, PERIOD.

AAAANNND that’s it, everybody! Be sure to like, comment, and subscribe, and I’ll see you all the next time Jyger wants to suck up to superheroes!

… … … … …I’mma kill him. -_-

My Thoughts On The All-New, All-Different Marvel Books

So, I went ahead and got the free preview book for the All-New, All-Different Marvel, which begins in October. As such, I’d like to give my thoughts on a few specific ones, general looks at the rest, and just talk about a few things I feel might be missing from the new Marvel Universe as a whole, as it’s being shown here. Also, not gonna bother talking about the ones already revealed that I talked about before, so if you notice some rather notable books missing from this article, click here to see if I mentioned them already. Let’s start off with probably the obvious…

Additional Avengers Books

I told ya. ^_^ So, in addition to the All-New, All-Different Avengers, AKA Earth’s Mightiest Most Dedicated Heroes, and the all-superheroines A-Force, we’ve got a couple other Avengers teams. The first is the Uncanny Avengers which, as shown above, will star Rogue, Steve Rogers, Human Torch, Doctor Voodoo, Quicksilver…um, some woman I don’t recognize, the Amazing Spider-Man, and the back-from-the-dead Deadpool…because, let’s be honest, we knew he would be. lol The other team is the New Avengers, which will star Songbird, Hulkling, Wiccan, Hawkeye, Squirrel Girl, and Sunspot as part of the new Avengers Idea Mechanics. On top of that, there’s a new Illuminati book, which apparently is now about a team of villains, and a new Ultimates book, which features Black Panther, Blue Marvel, Miss America, Captain Marvel, and Spectrum going up against Galactus. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is getting written by one of the show runners for Arrow, of all people. Howling Commandos of S.H.I.E.L.D. will apparently have Dum-Dum Dugan teaming with Elsa Bloodstone and the monsters of the Secret Wars Howling Commandos. And lastly, there’s gonna be a Contest of Champions book, which may or may not tie into the game, and has Maestro pitting heroes against one another in an arena. And that’s not even the end of the team books, because guess who?

The X-Men Titles

Yup, you can put down the riot helmets and posters, they’re still around, folks. We have three books with the name X-Men in them: Extraordinary X-Men (Storm, Iceman, Colossus, time-displaced Jean Grey, Old Man Logan, Nightcrawler, and Magik), All-New X-Men (time-displaced Beast, Iceman, Cyclops, and Angel, along with the All-New Wolverine), and Uncanny X-Men (Magneto, Mystique, Sabertooth, Psylocke, and Fantomex). There’re also three other X-Men related books: Old Man Logan, which features the aged Logan existing in this new world, All-New Wolverine, which has X-23 stepping into the role, and Deadpool…’nuff said there. XD Supposedly, in the eight month gap between Secret Wars and the new books (which I’m guessing they’ll fill us in on later), there was some sort of incident between Mutants and Inhumans, which will help explain this new status quo for the two sides, as present day Beast will be joining the Uncanny Inhumans as a result of that.

Spider-Man Incorporated?

In addition to the Spider-Man book I mentioned starring Miles Morales, as well as the relaunched Spider-Gwen, there are several other Spider-related books coming out. Amazing Spider-Man will have Peter launching a new and improved Parker Industries worldwide, bringing back the Spider-Mobile, and pulling the old Tony Stark trick by having his superhero identity be his ‘bodyguard’. Also, for those wondering, he’s not still married from Secret Wars, and the book will probably never even mention what happened in One More Day, so don’t expect to see me buying this…which is sad, because otherwise, this looks like it’ll be nice, crazy fun. Web Warriors will feature Spider-Gwen teaming up with Spider-Girl, Spider-Ham, and a few other Spider-Men from various realities as some sort of Spider-Man Incorporated-like team…because why not at this point? Silk is ‘apparently’ turning heel, although I don’t know if I buy it just yet. Carnage is coming back after sacrificing himself during AXIS, so it’ll be interesting to see if he’s still a hero or not. Spider-Man 2099 is sticking around, with a new costume to boot. Then there’s Venom: Spaceknight… … …If Rom doesn’t show up, I’ll be so sad. lol Before I continue, though, there’s something specific I need to discuss…

Spider-Woman PREGNANT?!?!

…Yeah, Spider-Woman’s a mom now. And, as I understand it, the new books pick up approximately 8 months after the end of Secret Wars, so I think the implication is that Jessica is about a month or two away from delivering the baby… … …Okay, first off, I will admit to having to stop myself from squeeing at the idea of Jess having a baby. lol Also, I DO kinda find the whole single-mom-being-a-superheroine schtick kinda awesome. However, if I’m correct and the implication is that she’s still active as a heroine while carrying the baby, can I just ask one question: WHY?!?! That is super dangerous, not only to Spider-Woman, but to the baby! Now, maybe I’m way off, and the series actually picks up with her either finding out she’s pregnant or as she’s having the baby, but I REALLY hope she’s not putting on the costume and gliding through the night skies while carrying the kid. Also, who is the father? Is she even dating anyone currently? Oh, PLEASE don’t let this be another ‘mystical pregnancy’ storyline. I learned of Avengers #200 just last year, and I still haven’t gotten the bad taste outta my mouth. Otherwise, though, as I said, kinda excited to see the kid. lol

Uchuu KITAAAAAAAAAA!!!

500 geek points to the first person who gets that reference. ^_^ Also, a million geek points says that’s Kitty Pryde posing as Star-Lord in the new Guardians of the Galaxy book. With that said, two questions come to mind: Where is her fiancé (the new Star-Lord book SUGGESTS time travel, but I have no idea), and what’s with all the dudes on the team besides her? It’s Thing, Drax, Venom, Rocket, and Groot, with Rocket as the only one who isn’t some buffed up powerhouse. I know Gamora left (and I’ll get back to that later), but where’s Captain Marvel? Mantis? ANY of the other space-faring superheroes that aren’t bulky dudes? Other than that, as I said, Star-Lord looks like he might be travelling through time, the Uncanny Inhumans are gonna be kicking ass as the next big superhero team, Drax is entering the interstellar octagon, Angela might be running Hel, Karnak is getting a solo title, and Nova has Sam teaming up with either his dad or Richard Rider, I can’t tell. And Howard the Duck is getting a relaunched solo where even the creative team are openly acknowledging how silly it is to relaunch it so soon.

SO MANY SOLOS! XD

Getting back to the Avengers, there are a lot of them getting their own solo books, so let’s do a quick rundown of each. Sam Wilson and Steve Rogers will apparently be in the middle of a schism of some sort in ‘Sam Wilson, Captain America’, which could get more than a little awkward for the foreseeable future. Ms. Marvel is gonna be fangirling like a crazy person over the fact that she’s an Avenger (and in record time), which I can’t wait to read. The Totally Awesome Hulk is more than likely gonna turn out to be Amadeus Cho, all things considered, especially given that both Greg Pak and Frank Cho LOVE the guy. Daredevil is supposedly gonna be teaming up with Gambit… … …’kay. Doctor Strange, Invincible Iron Man, and Captain Marvel, already said my piece on them. All-New Hawkeye might be All-OLD Hawkeye, as Clint Barton may be joining in the old heroes club for some reason and having a clash of some sort with Kate Bishop…not sure what’s going on there. Scarlet Witch is finally getting a solo book that will last longer than 4 issues. Vision is starting a new robotic family…in which family sitcom hijinx are almost certain to follow. lol Astonishing Ant-Man is apparently going back to his villainous ways, although he’s got his fingers crossed on the cover, so probably a ruse. And then there’s the last book I wanna talk about…

The Mighty Thor

Okay, I had a big talk about this on Deviant Art recently, and I gotta be honest with you guys about this. While I like the idea of Jane Foster in the role, there exists many problems with it and this book in general. Now, her getting the name Thor doesn’t bother me as much as a lot of people, since it’s not like she’s a usurper or anything, Odinson GAVE the name to her. What bothers me is that this is the only time someone else has taken up the hammer and kept the name Thor, unlike in the cases of Beta Ray Bill and Thunderstrike. Also, the mystery behind what Fury said to Odinson probably won’t pay off in the long run, Odin is being a colossally sexist douchebag for reasons that are out of character for even him, and Jane’s voice and mannerisms just feel off for the character, although her inner monologue makes up for it a little bit. And how the hell did the inscription on the hammer change anyway (which should probably have had the inscription instead say ‘if THEY be worthy’ from the beginning, as opposed to the former ‘he’ or current ‘she’. More gender neutral, and let’s face it, women have held the hammer before now anyway)? Don’t get me wrong, I’m still very excited to see her as a member of the Avengers post-Secret Wars, and seeing Odinson still be active and badass is good, but it feels kinda tainted by, I’m sorry, bad writing. So, what would I have done differently? I would’ve had Jane gain Mjölnir for a short time, then do what they did with Thunderstrike by having her gain a new hammer of her own with her own badass identity while Thor regains Mjölnir and have the two running at the same time as God and Goddess of Thunder. And before you think it wouldn’t sell well, I would just like to remind that, back in the day, Thunderstrike at one point was vastly out-selling Thor.

So, that’s all well and good, but what’s missing from this equation? Well, looking at the books present and the characters on the banners, I notice that Black Panther only shows up in the Ultimates book so far, Inferno isn’t appearing on the cover for Uncanny Inhumans and may have been swapped out for Reader, and Citizen V and Red Wolf have yet to show up at all. Other than those present on the banners, though, the most notable absentee from the new books is probably Black Widow, which is odd since her solo title was doing really well. Further compounding her absence, however, is a rumour on Twitter I’ve been trying to track back to its source regarding her possible DEATH. I don’t know where this rumour started, but if it’s true, I can tell you for a fact that a lot of people are gonna be ticked off. Other absentees are Gamora, who is supposed to be getting her own book soon, the Fantastic 4, although I already assumed that would be happening, Loki, who has been on a huge roll since the first Avengers movie came out, All-New Ghost Rider, who just got started last year, and while they’re on team books, it’s odd that Rocket Raccoon, Storm, Squirrel Girl, and She-Hulk’s solo titles are apparently not being renewed. As such, I get the feeling this isn’t all there is planned.

Anyway, that’s all I gotta say about the new books so far. Lemme know what you think in the comments section, and we’ll see if any more books get announced between now and October. Ja né!