N. Harmonik’s Rant – Albus Potter In The Harry Potter and the Cursed Child (WARNING – SPOILERS & ANGRY RANT)
DISCLAIMER: The following is a rant relating to the play Harry Potter and the Cursed Child. If you’re upset by the opinions expressed here, remember, this was done mainly so that N. Harmonik could blow off some steam about a specific plot point…and because I knew it’d be frickin’ hilarious. Please enjoy.
Hello, chaps and chapesses! N. Harmonik here! I know Jyger’s usually the one who rants on here, but BOY do I have something to say in regards to a certain character in Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, so spoilers ahoy!
In this play, Albus Potter, second son of Harry, overhears his dad talking to Amos Diggory about a rumour of a special Time-Turner being discovered, despite them all having been supposedly destroyed years ago. Amos wants to know if it’s true and, if it is, use it prevent his son, Cedric, from being murdered by Peter Pettigrew and Voldemort. Harry states that it’s just a rumour, and that messing with time can have dire consequences. The next day, Albus learns from his friend, Scorpius Malfoy, that the rumour is true, and decides to go get the Time-Turner and use it to save Cedric Diggory, and actually states that his dad doesn’t care…And now I must rant like I’m making a Howler. Ahem…
ALBUS SEVERUS FUCKING POTTER, DON’T YOU DARE USE THAT SPECIAL TIME-TURNER TO SAVE SOMEONE’S LIFE! NOT ONLY ARE YOU GOING TO BE PUTTING YOURSELVES IN GRAVE DANGER, BECAUSE YOU’LL BE IN THE MIDST OF VOLDEMORT HIMSELF (WEAKENED AT THAT TIME OR NOT, HE WAS STILL ABLE TO KILL), BUT THERE IS PRECEDENCE IN IMPROPER USAGE OF TIME-TURNERS CAUSING PEOPLE TO VANISH FROM THE TIMELINE COMPLETELY!! AND EVEN IF YOU SUCCEED, DO YOU THINK CEDRIC WOULD LIKE THAT SEVERAL PEOPLE’S EXISTENCES WERE TRADED FOR HIS LIFE? I DON’T FUCKING THINK SO!!! …OH, AND YOUR FATHER DOES CARE!! IT’S JUST HE KNOWS IT’S FAR TOO RISKY!!!!
…What about when Sally Acorn saved her nanny in Sonic SatAM?
YOU SHUT YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH!!!
Oookay, so, lemme know what you all think in the comments below, and…I gotta go show Aibo some kitten videos to calm her down. Ja né!